Xanderus
by tohonomike
Summary: Xander has a bad laundry day a couple days before Halloween, and things get very strange.
1. Chapter 1

Xander(us) Halloween Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but feedback, I might come up with something more/better. Summary: This is the fastest fanfic I've ever attempted, and it took about an hour since most of the story was taken from existing ME material. I hope it doesn't reek too badly. 

**_What if Xander had had a really bad laundry day just before Halloween?_**

Xander crawled out of bed late; his parents had already left for the day, and Xander, finding all of his usual clothes either soaking in the washer or heaped in with his father's alcohol-scented ones on the laundry floor. Walking out of the basement, Xander looked over to the open closet to see a dark coat, boots and other clothes left behind on Uncle Rory's last bender with his father months ago. Taking a closer look, Xander found that the clothes were clean, if a little TOO Dead-Boy like. He left the rather heavy coat at home to avoid thinking more on that topic.

**SHS**

Xander made it to school dressed in black dress shoes, black dress slacks, and black silk shirt that emphasized the muscles he'd been developing in the last ten months. Many heads turned that day at Xander's different attire, and he'd responded to Willow's "Why are you dressed like Angel?" with a rather blunt "I'm dressed in Uncle Rory's clothes, they were all that were clean, alright?" He did receive a surprise invitation to a couple of Halloween parties. 'Hmmm, maybe the Angel _but human_ look might be worth considering…'

The day passed uneventfully, though even Xander noticed a slight improvement in how he was treated until he'd stumbled into Willow and Buffy near a sign-up table for the volunteer safety program for Halloween. Principal Snyder takes one of the clipboards and looks around the hall, generally ending a lingering improved mood.

Willow, "Snyder must be in charge of the volunteer safety program for Halloween this year."

Xander, "Note his interesting take on the volunteer concept."

Buffy, "What's the deal?"

They've reached Willow's locker, and she works the combination.

Xander, "Oh, a bunch of little kids need people to take them trick-or-treating. Sign up and get your own pack of sugar-hyped little runts for the night."

Buffy, "Yikes. I'll stick to vampires."

Snyder puts his hand on her shoulder, and spins her around to face him, "Miss Summers. Just the juvenile delinquent I've been looking for."

"Principal Snyder!"

"Halloween must be a big night for you. Tossing eggs, keying cars, bobbing for apples, one pathetic cry for help after another. Well, not this year, missy," Snyder declares, leading her to the sign-up table.

"Gosh, I'd love to sign up, but I recently developed carpal tunnel syndrome, and can tragically no longer hold a flashlight."

Snyder holds up the clipboard and pen, "The program starts at four, the children have to be back at six."

Buffy reluctantly grabs the pen and clipboard and signs herself up. Xander thinks it's funny and smiles back at Willow. Willow has a concerned look on her face. Snyder holds pens out to Willow and Xander, too. Willow gives in and takes the pen. Xander indicates his attire, "I have to work for Uncle Rory until six, otherwise you'd have me."

"I can't believe this," Xander said when they're safely out of Snyder's earshot, "You have to get dressed up and the whole deal?"

"Snyder said costumes were mandatory," Willow stated, "Looks like you dressed all dark and black means no costume for you, huh?"

"Well I've been invited to a couple parties over near Cordelia's area of town, so I'll hopefully find something better than a clone Buffy's boyfriend."

"I was gonna stay in and veg," Buffy sighed. "The one night a year things are supposed to be quiet for me."

"Halloween quiet?" Xander replied in amazement, "I figured it'd be a big old vamp scare-apalooza." They walk into the lounge.

'Not according to Giles,' Buffy replied, "He swears that tomorrow night is, like, dead for the undead; they stay in."

Xander puts his satchel down on the table and heads over to the soda vending machine. He puts in his coins and hits a button. Nothing. He hits another one. Still nothing. He hits the machine in the front and on the side. Larry comes up to him and puts his hand on Xander's shoulder.

"Harris!"

"Hey, Lar. You're lookin' Cro-Mag as usual. What can I do you for?"

"You and Buffy, you're just friends, right?"

"I like to think of it less as a friendship and more as a solid foundation for future bliss."

"So, she, she's not your girlfriend?""

"Alas, no. I only dress like her boyfriend."

Larry looks over at Buffy as he walks around Xander, "Boyfriend? Oh, never mind."

"How was your date last night?" Willow asks Buffy.

"Misfire. I was late due to unscheduled slayage," Buffy grimaces, "Showed up looking trashed."

"Was he mad?"

Xander, not in the mood to listen, grabs his bag from the table and walks off, "I got things to do. Why am I plagued by Dead-Boy comparisons and jocks thinking I'm your boyfriend today? I'm half-tempted to dress as the annoying one as my costume to just save myself the trouble of figuring one out." Buffy moans and sits back down with Willow.

**Ethan's Costume Shop**

The store is full of mothers with their kids looking for Halloween costumes. Buffy is handling a plastic pumpkin when it suddenly lights up and screams. She quickly puts it back on the counter. Willow comes over to her.

"What'd you get?" Buffy asks Willow.

"A time-honored classic! (holds up a ghost costume)"

"Okay, Will, can I give you a little friendly advice?"

"It's not spooky enough?"

"It's just... you're never gonna get noticed if you keep hiding. You're missing the whole point of Halloween."

"Free candy?"

"It's come as you aren't night. The perfect chance for a girl to get sexy and wild with no repercussions."

"Oh, I don't get wild. Wild on me equals spaz."

"Don't underestimate yourself. You've got it in you."

"Hey, Xander!" Buffy calls out, causing him to veer over to them.

"What'd you get?" Willow asks Buffy.

"Nothing so far. I'm going to look a while longer. I'll b—"

Buffy is distracted by a costume and wanders off while he's talking. She slowly starts walking over to it.

"Hello!" Xander responds, rolling his eyes, "That was our conversing there."

She keeps walking over to a frilly, red, billowy 18th-century gown.

Ethan notices her looking at the dress and comes over to them, "Please, let me." He takes the dress off of its dressmaker's mannequin and holds it up to her in front of a mirror.

"Oh, i-it's..."

"Magnificent. Yes, I know. There. My. Meet the hidden princess. I think we found a match. Don't you?"

"Oh, uh, I-I'm sorry. There's no way I could ever afford this."

"Oh, nonsense. I feel quite moved to make you a deal you can't refuse."

She looks back into the mirror, takes the dress from Ethan and smiles dreamily as she holds it up to her chin.

Ethan notes the look of frustration, and overhears something that piques his interest as the young man heads toward the back of the shop. "Angelus, again. I'm beginning to think of dressing up as the human version of the 'Scourge of Europe' is the only way to get noticed in this town…maybe a sword, or daggers…maybe Giles would have an idea."

Moments later Ethan walks up behind the young man, startling him.

"Hey, careful about sneaking up on people in this town," Xander admonishes.

"Well, the sun is still up, and I've not been in town long enough to deny what exists. Perchance did you mean Rupert Giles?"

"You know the G-Man? Small world, huh?" Xander responded.

"Indeed, I do. And since we both KNOW…" Ethan crooned, "I'm moved to help you find exactly what you'll need to 'get noticed' in this town, and perhaps gain the favor of a certain…princess?"

"That's unlikely…and I have to go get some things done."

"Tell you what, young man, if you leave as many black clothes and such with me as you can, I'll fill out the rest for you, but you'll have to promise not to tell Rupert until the day after Halloween, as I'd planned to surprise him."

"I really don't have much money…"

"Money is not an object, as you know Rupert, and have provided the only costume challenge I've had. Now, if you have a change of clothes, what you have will do nicely as a start."

**Spike's Warehouse**

"Edith needs her tea," Drusilla ponders.

"C'mere, poodle," Spike encourages.

"Do you love my insides? The parts you can't see?"

"Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet. That's why I've got to study this Slayer. Once I know her I can kill her. And once I kill her you can have your run of Sunnyhell. Get strong again."

"Don't worry. Everything's switching. Outside to inside. It makes her weak."

"Really? Did my pet have a vision?"

"Do you know what I miss? Leeches."

"Come on, talk to Daddy. This thing that makes the Slayer weak? When is it?"

"Tomorrow. And Daddy's coming back."

"Of course I'm coming back. Tomorrow's Halloween. Nothing happens on Halloween."

"Someone's come to change it all. Someone new. "

Xander Harris is finishing getting dressed in his costume; it seemed that friend of Giles had gone all-out. Hair and hair extensions carefully pulled back and tied with a blood-colored ribbon with a tiny human on it. A long nobleman's coat covered with braid and decoration over midnight blue-black soft leather, expensive leather riding boots, a claddagh ring, sword and various-glimpsed weapons, including four flintlocks and silvered daggers. Even a 'journal' of Angelus, who on Halloween 1997 became Human, empowered but alive.

**The streets.**

A student dressed as a vampire is escorting a group of kids. They walk by Buffy's group coming back from a house. Buffy crouches down to see what they got.

"What did Mrs. Davis give you?"

They all pull out toothbrushes.

"She must be stopped. Let's hit one more house. We still have a few more minutes before I need to get you back."

**Ethan's**

Ethan weaves a spell in Latin, keeping the balanced extreme of Angelus-Xander in his mind, not knowing how this odd random individual might fare.

"Janus, I invoke your spirit. Hear my plea. Seize the night for your own reason. Come, appear and show to us that which is infinite power."

**Streets**

Angel prepared to leave his apartment to meet Buffy for a quiet night at her house. He reached for the doorknob, suddenly hunching over in pain, screaming and—

**Warehouse District on way to party**

Xander jerks back like he's just been hit by something. He bends over slightly, looks around and smiles evilly. Slowly he straightens back up and surveys the scene around him. He flexes his hands and draws a sword out and laughs loudly as four vampires leave a warehouse, a cocky British accent echoing from further down the street.

He draws near the door, the four vampires confused to see him sneering.

"You smell funny, human. You'll make an interesting snack," the largest of the undead laughed.

"That's because," the brown-eyed human explained as he decapitated the large vampire, whirling around the dust to sweep-kick two others as they gaped, "I'm a little more than human, and certainly more interesting then you hired help."

The strong human sneered at the standing vampire, and stabbed it in the chest with the silvered blade, dusting it and causing the two downed vamps to scurry down the street rather than face final death.

Kicking in the door and parading in, his eyes rested upon the pallored beauty of Drusilla, "Daddy's home, Dru. How 'bout a little fun."

"Daddy!" Dru squealed with joy and leaped lustfully upon him. "How…are you and…the kitten in…one…body, my Angelus."

"I don't know, Dru, but that soul is gone, and it's time to paint the town with blood. But first…"

**Grayed-Out NC-17 Scene**

**Warehouse 30 minutes later.**

"Mmmm, so warm, my Angel, Mommy's missed you so. I feel the demon and the soul, the power and the life. Miss E—"

"Dru, where's Spike? I have revenge to exact, and blood to spill, and a mage to thank once the boy quiets down."

"My William's gone after the slayer, she's weak tonight she is. The magic takes away who she is, like you and the kitten."

At that, Angelus in human form races out of the warehouse, dusting a minion out of rage as he goes, frustrated that his vengeance might be ruined by his grandchilde, and aware that the magic granting him control of the body, was less than secure until he could locate the mage responsible for this freedom.

"Stop that growling, boy, or I'll find a way to torture you worse than any other," Angelus screamed aloud, feeling like something was bearing down on him inside.

**Summers house**

Ghost-Willow, walking in the door, "Hello? Mrs. Summers? Good, she's gone."

"Where are we?" Lady Buffy asks.

"Your place. Now we just need to..."

Buffy notices a picture on a table and goes over to look. She picks it up, and sees it's of her wearing a spaghetti strap top. She turns around as Willow comes over to her.

"This... this could be me."

"It is you. Buffy, can't you remember at all?"

"No! I, I don't understand any of this! Uh, uh, th... This is some other girl! I would never wear this, that low apparel, and I don't like this place, and I don't like you, and I just wanna go home!"

"You are home!"

Buffy is practically in tears. They hear a woman screaming outside. Willow rolls her eyes and heads into the living room. Buffy is wide-eyed with fear.

Willow opens the door to see Cordelia screaming as she runs from a sasquatch.

"Somebody help me!" Cordelia cries out.

"Come inside Cordelia!" Willow tells her, "Hurry!"

"Wait a... What's going on?"

"Okay, your name is Cordelia, you're not a cat, you're in high school, and we're your friends. Well, sort of."

"That's nice, Willow. And you went mental when?"

"You know us?"

"Yeah. Lucky me. What's with the name game?"

"A lot's going on."

"No kidding. I was just attacked by Jo-Jo, the Dog-Faced Boy. Look at my costume! Do you really think that Partytown's gonna give me my deposit back? Not likely."

"Okay. You guys stay here while I get some help. If something tries to get in, just fight it off."

"Well," Buffy huffed in confusion, "I-it's not our place to fight. Uh, surely some men will protect us."

"What's that riff?" Cordelia asks in disgust.

"I-it's like amnesia, okay?" Willow replies, rolling her eyes, "She doesn't know who she is. Just sit tight."

"Who died and made her the boss?" Cordelia complains as Willow walks through the wall. Buffy stares in wide-eyed amazement and pales with shock.

**Streets**

Several monsters are chasing people down the street past Spike.

"Well! This is just... neat!" the vampire enthuses.

**Streets**

Angelus races through the night toward 1630 Revello Drive, dusting his fifth vampire en route, "I'm NOT human, dammit!"

**SHS Library**

Giles is going through a stack of cards he's pulled from the card catalog. He hears yelling and sirens outside and looks up, wondering what's going on. He sees Willow come though the wall and jumps in complete surprise, letting the cards fly all over the place.

"Jeez!" Giles calls out in surprise.

"Hi."

"Uh... ah...huh..."

**Summers House**

The lights go out. Buffy grabs Cordelia in fright.

"Do you mind?" Cordelia asks in annoyance.

Buffy lets go of her. The basement door behind Buffy opens, and a vampire attacks her. She tries to push the door closed on him. Cordelia hits him in the head and locks him in the basement while Buffy screams at the top of her lungs and runs for the door.

"Buffy, no!"

**SHS Library**

Giles is in the cage getting a stack of old papers. He blows the dust off of them and comes back out. Willow is looking at a book.

Willow, "I don't even know what I'm looking for. Plus I can't turn the page."

"Well, alright, l-let's, let's, let's review. (sets the papers on the table) Um, so everybody became, uh, whatever they were masquerading as."

"Buffy was an 18th-century girl and I went as a ghost."

"Yes. Um... w, uh, uh, uh, the ghost of what, exactly?"

"Well, this is nothing. You should see what Cordelia was wearing. A-a, a unitard with cat things, like ears and stuff."

"Good heavens. Uh, sh-sh-she became an actual feline?"

"No! She was the same old Cordelia. Just in a cat costume."

"She didn't change."

"No. Hold on... Partytown. She told us she get her outfit from Partytown."

"A-a-and everyone who changed, they, they, they, they acquired their costumes where?"

"We all got ours at a new place. Ethan's."

**Alley**

Buffy runs between all the trash that's piled up there. Cordelia is still looking for her.

**Streets**

Spike: Somewhere out here is the tenderest meat you've ever tasted, and all we have to do is find her first!

Buffy has stopped running and leans against a crate. She sniffs and looks around, frightened. She lifts her skirt a bit and starts to walk. She turns around to look behind her and takes a few steps backward. When she turns back around Larry, who has turned into a pirate, startles her. He smiles widely at her, showing his rotten teeth.

Larry: Pretty, pretty!

Buffy tries to run away, and Larry gives chase until Buffy trips and falls. Her gown billows out around her. Larry grabs her as she tries to get up and shoves her against a crate. He pushes her hair away from her frightened face and moves in to kiss her.

Angelus comes running and throws Larry into a wall. He gets up and pulls Larry up and into a metal warehouse door. He punches him in the face and gut. Larry collapses in pain.

Cordelia arrives behind Buffy, "Buffy! Are you okay?"

Willow comes running down the alley from the other end, "Guys, you gotta get inside!

She looks back and they see Spike and his monster gang coming.

Angelus in Xander form laughs evilly, "Too late, I'm the one to worry about. Spike! Over here you waste!"

They back down the alley as they watch Spike, two minions and his horde of mini-monsters approach. The monsters arrive and wait for Spike's signal.

Buffy is holding on tightly to Cordelia.

Oh, faboo, more clinging.

Spike looks intently at the slayer's friend, smelling Drusilla on him and filling him with rage.

"What the bloody 'ell is goin' on whelp. Why do I smell Dru all over you!" he shouts as he lunges into air, struck with the flat of a sword on his backside.

"Mommy wanted to greet Daddy now that he's back, Billy," Angelus replied, laughing.

"What the, it's you Angelus! How the bloody 'ell did this 'appen."

"Dru says a mage did all of this, so Angel's dust, and here I am. The slayer's mine, Billy. Go home and maybe your Dru will make it better…just get out of my way."

"You may be strong and fast, Angelus, but you're human and killable now, mate," he says, managing to crush Angelus' knee with a kick, causing Angelus, Xander and something else to scream in rage and pain.

They back away, staring and waiting for the next one to make a move.

**Ethan's**

Ethan is on the floor, severely beaten up, "And you said the Ripper was long gone."

"Tell me how to stop the spell."

"Say 'pretty please'."

Giles kicks him hard in the kidney, and he yells out in pain.

**Alley, Inside Xander's Mind**

Xander and the recharged but mindless remnants of the hyena leapt on the demon essence of Angelus, freezing him for a brief instant as he stared at Spike. The hyena screamed and clawed and savaged, shredding the cohesion of an embodied demon tenuously connected to the host with chaos. Xander lunged forward to wrest control of the body, the hyena and Angelus merging into a single conflict of instinct and strength, forcibly imbuing the host with power in attempt to wrest control enough of the whole to survive. The knee heals with faster than vampiric speed.

Outside the body, Spike lunges forward, grasping Xander by the throat and rolling and slamming each other into debris as the minions surround Cordelia and Buffy.

Xander internally and externally screams, "Spike's winning…and his minions have Buffy."

**Ethan's**

Giles kicks him again.

Giles: Now, tell me how to stop the spell.

Ethan: Janus. Break its statue.

Giles grabs the statue and lifts it over his head and throws the statue hard to the floor, smashing it into tiny pieces.

**Alley**

The fighting for bodily control ends as each focuses on the fact that Spike will have Buffy/mate/slayer and they surge forth as the magics blur and waver, adrenaline throwing Spike back into two of his minions.

The body of Xander Harris, enraged, rushes forward at vampiric speed, silvered daggers decapitating the minions, and chasing away the mini-demons. Turning to deal with Spike, he sheathes the blades, draws his flintlocks and fires into the confused…William the Dusty.

"What the..." Xander begins, the monsters having all turned back into children and student escorts. The kids are frightened, and begin to cry and complain.

"I'm scared! I want my mommy!"

"Hi, everybody. I'm back. You know what? It's good to be me.

"Hey, Buff," Xander smiled, "Welcome back.

"Yeah! You, too."

"You guys remember what happened?" Cordelia asked.

"It was way creepy," Xander confirmed, "It's like I was there, but I couldn't get out. I kept fighting, and with a bit of help from the hyena I was able to hold out. Now it's me and a lot of material for nightmares.

"Yeah, I know the feeling," Cordelia complained, "This outfit's totally skintight. And my deposit...forget it."

"You okay Buffy?" Xander asked

"Yeah, Xander, was Angelus really in you?"

He puts his arm around her shoulders and leads her away, "Yeah, Buff. Whoever did this…well, Angelus crowed that Angel's soul was released and the body gone. He… loved you, Buff. He loved you."

Buffy breaks down, sobbing. Xander picks her up and carries her home.

"Hello! It felt like I was talking, my lips were moving and..." Cordelia said, then gave up, "well, I guess I better get you kids back to your parents.

**Summers house half-hour later**

Xander has set the sleeping Buffy in her bed, descending the stairs as Willow and Giles show up. They exchange stories of the night, Xander demonstrating that he is still very fast and strong.

"What do you remember of Angelus?" Giles asked Xander.

"Everything, from Liam, Angelus, Angel, Angelus, Xander. I remember every death. I remember his love of Buffy. I remember being a vampire, so cold. And I wonder what's next?"

"That's an easy one, kid," interrupts a Brooklyn-accented voice, "The Powers want you to replace Angel as their champion."


	2. Chapter 2

Xander(us) Secundus Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for one of those bright shiny 'coins of the realm' mentioned by Ten Hawk, I might come up with something more/better. 

**Our Previous Episode:**

**Summers house half-hour later**

Xander has set the sleeping Buffy in her bed, descending the stairs as Willow and Giles show up. They exchange stories of the night, Xander demonstrating that he is still very fast and strong.

Giles, "what do you remember of Angelus?"

Xander, "Everything, from Liam, Angelus, Angel, Angelus, Xander. I remember every death. I remember his love of Buffy. I remember being a vampire, so cold. And I wonder what's next?"

"That's an easy one, kid," interrupts a Brooklyn-accented voice, "The Powers want you to replace Angel as their champion."

Xander, Willow and Giles turned as one toward the kitchen, shocked at the intrusion as much as the words. Xander was up and across the room in an instant, picking up the short funny-smelling man and slamming him into the doorway as he noted the excellent fashion sense of candy-striped pants and a Hawaiian print shirt that matched one in his closet at home.

"Who are you and how did you get in here?" Xander demanded.

"The name's Whistler, kid, and I walked in the open backdoor," the balance demon replied, slightly flustered. "Like I was sayin' I'm here from the Powers That Be."

"W-Who are the Powers That Be?" Giles, asked, coming up behind Xander with a bit of "Ripper" slipping out, "and exactly what do you mean by 'replacing Angel as their champion?"

"If youse'd put me down…" the Balance demon continued hopefully, and with a nod from Giles, Xander lets the man down. Whistler takes a seat on the couch, regaining his cocky composure. "The Powers are, for example, the ones that determine who the next slayer is, send visions to seers, and generally try to keep things going without directly interferin' you with me so far?"

At their nods, he continues, "Anyhows, Angel was destined to be a major player down the road, and by helping you here he was being readied. Kinda like the minor leagues. Thanks to a certain chaos mage, the home team has an empty seat on the bench. The Powers want you t—"

"That's nice, Whistler," Xander interrupted, "but I'm starting to remember a few things about you and Dead-Boy. You're a balance demon, not a "good" demon. Why are you here? And since you're the one responsible for Brooding-Guy coming to town and being cryptic, why should I listen to you at all?"

"Because right now things are not out of balance, so I'm allowed run errands for the good guys…like an umpire from the home town team…I might not like some of the calls I make, but I can still hope. Also, if you remember from Angel's memories, I was like his Watcher before he came to Sunnydale, providing support and training."

"S-so that's what you're offering young Mr. Harris, I presume?" Giles asked, seeking clarification on the main topic.

"Essentially, yes," Whistler confirmed, "plus he'll keep his new abilities and skills as part of the bargain."

"A-and those would be?" Giles pressed.

"The hyena and vampire strengths, senses, speed, healing, fighting skills, stealth, memories and such," Whistler started listing.

"You call two hundred years of blood-sucking memories and murder a plus?" Xander interrupted incredulously. "Are you out of YOUR FRICKIN MIND! WHY! Why would I want that? And since the Powers didn't give me any of this and didn't see it coming, why should I take you seriously? Seems to me all I need is a few spell books and a caster…G-Man—" "Don't call me that" "caan provide the training and watchin. And I wouldn't go a-braggin' a-boot the Slayer thing 'round here. Buffy was never asked ta' be a Vampire Slayer riskin' 'er life fer Powers That Didn't Ask, so if we're going to talk in baseball terms, I'm a free agent. So there!"

"X-Xander," Willow asked, stepping back from her friend, "why are you speaking that way?"

"What way Wills?"

"Kinda Irishy?"

"It must be the Liam and Angelus memories," Xander contemplated aloud. "They had serious problems with anyone wanting them to do something. Even lazier than Angel." Xander felt a hand on his shoulder as Giles indicated he should return his attention to the balance demon currently carrying out a whispered conversation with the ceiling.

"Well kid," Whistler approached, "What do you want? And don't be too greedy, the Powers assist, don't intervene, remember?"

"Xander," Giles said, precluding a response from Xander, "do you think you should rush into anything?"

"Giles, I trust you and Will to watch out for me, and later I might wuss out and do something really stupid," the young man asserted. Then turning to the demon, "does the deal really come with the vampire healing and live forever thing? Do I have that demon face thing?"

"Since you're human, as long as you don't have major organs wasted, you'll recover about half as fast as a vampire, you'll not age, you're immune to most diseases and such, poisons that don't wipe out organs will only keep damaging until they pass out of the body, which will keep healing until then. No cancer or such. No demon face, you're not demonic. Well?"

"How much does the job pay?"

"Nothin'"

"Cool weapons? Guns with infinite bullets? Actual information from the Powers instead of fragments like Dead-Boy? Eidetic memory? Money? Cast out possessors? Freedom from my parents? Immunity to magic? Money?"

"No. No. They're thinking about giving you a seer after you finish some training with me, no, no, only from the living, the court papers will be issued Monday morning, maybe an amulet. No."

"I don't seem to be getting much of a sign-on bonus, here. And I already have most of it.

Well, if you come up with a human seer, Giles'll handle the training, I want the slayer weapon and fighting knowledge, I want to be 21 not 16 looking, and to be very buff. Wills, G-Man, how'm I doing so far?"

"W-well, actually, s-surprisingly well," Giles replied, astonished at the young man's acumen, "Though you might not be too rude to these, err, Powers."

Willow broke in with "it's all those D&D games he played, Giles, wrangling with Jesse or Jonathon over every little character thing."

"Well, kid, you'll need blood for each major healing of yourself to replenish what you're burning off, we only have a half-human for the seer, no slayerness, sure and just this once."

Xander looked at those gathered around, then turned to Whistler. "Never mind. Your bosses want everything and give nothing. Tell you what, they want a friend, fine. I already chose this fight. They can go find a chumpion for the home team. No demon seers. If they want to give me 'friendship gifts' it might put me in a better mood when they ask for something. Consider it a free poke in the eye of any Bad Guys That Be since I won't count against the rookie draft limits. Oh, and let's drop the baseball analogy."

The four of them stood looking at each other, all shocked that he'd actually said 'No' to the championship, and that he'd used the word analogy appropriately. After a few minutes of silently waiting for a response from the Powers, Buffy came down from the top of the stairs where she'd heard most of the discussion, her face still showing tear streaks and red-eyes. It was at this time that Whistler, cocking his head as if listening, turned to Xander, "the Powers are NOT happy, kid. Maybe you should rethink thin—"

"NO MORE CRAP!" Xander screamed, stunning everybody in the room. The years of memories and pain were no longer suppressible even by one used to so doing. "YOUR POWERS ALREADY LET BUFFY DIE. I BROUGHT HER BACK, NOT YOUR CHAMPIONS. YOUR POWERS LET A DEMON IN ME. YOUR POWERS LET MY PARENTS AND LIAM'S…HURT US. YOU LET ANGELUS RUN FREE MURDERING FOR A CENTURY. YOU LET HIM GO UNPUNISHED. YOU LET DARLA GO UNPUNISHED. YOU LET GYPSIES TORTURE A SOUL THAT DIDN'T MURDER ANYBODY. YOU LET YOUR CHAMPION DIE ALONE…YOU KILLED BUFFY'S BOYFRIEND, YOU DUMBASSES. YOU LET SOME CRAZY MAGIC GUY TRY TO KILL PEOPLE I LOVE. I JUST WISH I HAD WHATEVER I NEEDED TO BE THE 'CHAMPION' I SHOULD BE, THAT ANGEL SHOULD'VE BEEN, THAT LIAM MIGHT'VE BEEN, SO THAT I COULD JUST…tell you to just go…"

"DONE!" shouted a chorus of diminutive female demons and their chortling robed and horned male boss as they faded away, delighted that they could turn righteous scorn and vengeance in the stead of the dead victims of Angelus, and on behalf of an alive young woman and her white knight against the plans of the Powers. Two hundred years of vengeance covered in a single wish.

The dark-haired teen was engulfed in white-gold light, screaming in pain as a poorly dressed dark-haired man entered the house and was likewise afflicted.

Whistler gaped, fish-like, before turning to Giles, "The kid's on his own, Ripper. And anyone standing too close to him. Good luck."

Giles, Willow and Buffy rushed to help their friend as the light dissipated to show a very muscular Xander, seams split and buttons popped. Next to him a full duffle bag lay, unnoticed. "I so didn't need that," gasped the teen, only to hear from the new arrival's Irish accent complain, "It's like havin' bloody visions but all over."

Giles moved the man to the living room chair as the girls set Xander down on the couch to recover. Seeing that both were better, and that Whistler had disappeared, Giles introduced himself and his wards to the newcomer, receiving the reply, "My name's Doyle. I'm the seer. What's with the pain and light?"

"Y-you don't know?" Giles pressed curiously.

"Nah, I was told to drive here about two hours ago, and just got here, man," the Irishman conceded. "But I do admit to feeling outta sorts."

"Ow, and I thought I asked for a human not half-demon seer if they sent one," Xander tiredly stated as he sat up woozily, the girls helping. "What kind are you, any way? What do they look like?"

"I'm a half-brachen, just found out a year or so back," Doyle sighed. "And I look like…look like…I can't change!" Doyle turned to the others, "I'm not a demon any more!" Then, picking up a stake from the coffee table, broke it easily with thumb and two fingers. "I kept a little of my strength it seems."

"Th-that's probably because Xander complained about a non-human seer if they sent him one," Giles speculated. "A-and apparently the light and pain were your transformations as a result of Xander's, uh, outburst."

"So, Xander's the young man on the couch, then?" Doyle asked, continuing as Xander nodded, "You have a place I can stay fer now?"

"Yeah," Xander responded without thinking as he began to stand, "We'll head over to my apartment. It's full of stuff, but we'll make room."

"Xander," Willow began as her and Buffy separated from hugging Xander on the couch, "when did you get an apartment?"

"What do you mean? I'm paid up through the end of the ye—" the teen responded. "Ugh, these Dead-Boy memories are annoying. I'm me, but with most of the memories there…"

"But…you're just Xander, right?" Buffy asked with mixed emotions crossing her face, especially uncertainty.

"Yeah, Buff. No one in here except me," Xander replied, then added to himself so quietly that only Buffy could hear, "Sorry."

The blonde girl, shocked at this, fiercely hugged her friend, bursting once more into sobs, "I didn't mean it Xander, (sob) I didn't. I was afraid (sob) Angelus might be there. I-I was afraid of losing you, too. I…(sob)"

Willow joined in the hug, the three scoobs reassuring each other, Giles happily amazed at the apparent restoration of the closeness they'd had before Buffy's brief death. Xander separated the hug after a few minutes. "We'll meet at the Library tomorrow, around nine," Xander decided, quietly. Then, picking up the duffle and with the trademark Xander smirk, he calls out as he in full Dead-Boy regalia and 'power presence' heads out the door, "Come, Doyle. Destiny, or at least a dirty apartment with no groceries, awaits."

Credits roll as we watch but don't hear Giles and the girls watching the two men depart off-camera…

Pause

Pause

"No, I'm sooooo not giving you gas money.

Pause

"No whiskey, either."

Pause

"That's Buffy's mom pulling into the driveway"

Pause

"NO. I will NOT give you the phone number for the Slayer's MOM."

Pause

"Oooo, Twinkies. Maybe ONE tank of gas."


	3. Chapter 3

Xander(us) Part Three Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

**Morning after Halloween**

Xander awoke in semi-unfamiliar surroundings after disturbing dreams of people he and Angel had failed to save in the past. It was frightening how much in common he and Dead-Boy had beyond personality. He guessed that as the clock showed 7:30, he should go ahead and start the day. He was shocked to find his body hair to be extremely long all over, but in perfect condition; he guessed that it had grown overnight in response to the time it would have taken to become the Arnoldesque wonder his wish had created. He found some scissors and a piece of ribbon, and disturbingly enough, hair remover. Fifteen minutes later, and he'd de-pelted himself and trimmed back the beard to something acceptable, and tied back his knee-length hair. The only clothes he could find to fit him were his boxers and the shreds of last night's costume. Sighing as a tapping came upon his door, he called out, "Just a minute, I'm trying to find some clothes that'll fit."

A male voice from somewhere in the room addressed him, "Alexander, there are some fatigues in the duffle bag. Please put them on, and the ring. We have some things to discuss. I'll go watch the Irishman in the front room."

Stunned, Alexander complied while complaining, "Buffy gets slayer dreams, I get a crazy Irishman and a voice." Entering the next room, he nearly stumbled into a worried Doyle.

"Xander," the Irishman began nervously, "There are voices in yer 'house. And it feels cold in here."

"I heard something, t—" Xander began, only be interrupted by a voice from the past.

"Hey, bro, can you get your bud to turn on the set," Jesse shouted from the couch, "the Major and I've been telling Sarah about cartoons and it IS Saturday morning. And the ghost thing…no touchy remotey."

"Jess…Sarah…how?" gasped a shocked Xander, slowly moving toward two of the people in his dreams last night.

"Some weirdoes in togas and painted faces showed up with a scaly guy with horns when we died," Jesse quietly conveyed as he took Sarah by the hand and walking up to face him.

The Major, at a nod from Jesse, continued, "Like the kid said, these three show up, argue about whether or not we get to stay or go on, then they tell us about your wish. The horned guy says we have to come here, but these toga twins say we're dead already and that some Power guys are really ticked at you and refuse to allow the timeline to be changed. So, to make a long story longer, some incredible raven-haired goddess and a swarthy tough-guy show up, and talking in a language none of us understands, argues with both sides. Anyway, the gist of it is, swarthy-guy and wow-woman hand that bag of yours to the horned guy and in plain English tells him 'it is the last of our earthly presence now that the curse is lifted. Make sure Alexander gets it.' The horned guy looked more than a bit worried, so you got the bag. She then turns to Jesse and Sarah, and tells them that part of the wish was the champion that Liam might have been, saving Sarah and dusting Darla. Angel should have been more active from the beginning, so Jesse should have made it. Then she turns to me, and says that if you'da worn the fatigues last night like you were planning, you'd've gotten my skills and memories and such to help you successfully play a role at the side of the slayer in years to come. So, I'm here instead, to train and advise you. Also, so long as you wear any of the fatigues or dog tags, we are of solid form, and wearing the ring of your mother, the four of us are also visible and such to others. We either need to stay within 5 klicks of the hellmouth or about 10 yards of you. Otherwise we end up back at the hellmouth. Am I missing anything?"

"Yeah," Xander says, "your name."

"Oh," Soldier-Guy apologizes, holding out his hand to shake. "I'm Major Charles Kawalsky, USAF."

"Call me Xander," He responds, successfully shaking hands. "This is Doyle, who might still be a seer…" Xander, looking at his hand, turns to a smiling Jesse, and the brothers cross the distance between them, embracing and trying unsuccessfully not to cry.

"Jess-man…" Xander gasps, "I'm sorry…"

"It wasn't me, Bro," his best friend choked

"H-how long are you here?" Xander questioned worriedly.

"Sarah and I are here until her brother says his good-byes. He'll be here in a little while, then we'll go to the Library. My folks already moved away, so only you and Willow are left for me to see. The Major's here until you die or you otherwise figure something out."

"But—" Xander began, to be waved down by Jesse.

"Hey, Xander," the Major speaks up, handing a scroll, "the lady told me to give you this to read…hey, ah, everybody…let's give the kid a minute, huh?"

Xander moved back into the bedroom, moving the duffle aside to sit.

Dearest Alexander,

Mr. and Mrs. Harris were not who they seemed. Many

years ago a coup in the heavens changed the order of

things, a result being that One of Power was rendered

mortal and over a century ago was born of gypsies, her

memories stripped and her powers used to enforce this

state of affairs. She fought the evil many had accused

her previous self of instigating, and the echoes of her

past led her to become a mistress of warhorses and

wardogs.

The Powers that had cast her thus allowed that if she

passed through life as a champion, never knowing the

fullness of wife and mother, she would be restored. But

if she did, her and her consort, and any immediate family

would be cursed to live without love or the support of

family until such a time that the pain of her child would

release them forever from this plane.

There was a brother who had fought at their side, and

they were cast into there future to when the last of those

they had known were dead, with altered memories they

were placed at the Hellmouth to begin miserable lives

with little love.

Alexander, your wish released them, and they love you

and are very proud of you. Please do not take up vengeance

against the Powers; the cause of Light is the just path, even

if the Powers are enemies of our family. You are mortal, my

son, but now gifted as though a champion. You are the champion

of our family. We expect you to be what we weren't allowed

to be for you, and what your name means: Protector. You have

our journals of our early lives. You should definitely keep my

true heritage a secret, but the rest is up to you, though we caution

against it as right now you are untrained against those that would

come for you and your friends on the basis of your line. Wearing

the rings for the first time will reveal who we were and confer upon

you knowledge of the gifts we've sent you in the bag, Go through

life with our love and respect, Alexander. Knowing your family

will always care.

Your Mother and Father,

Anna Jessica and Abraham Anthony

Your Uncle,

Verkan Rory

For an hour after reading the letter, the young champion of his family wept and raged behind closed doors at the double loss of his family by the Powers, unaware of the curiously disappointed Vengeance Lord who was waiting on the other side of the window for an 'I wish…' that would never come.

The shocked young man turned to the duffle, now-finding this mothers twin torches and twin swords, the rings of his family, the restored clothes and weapons his father had worn in his final fight against the-then greatest threat to the world, his mother's amulet to negate all magic cast against the wearer, and a cornucopia exacted from a former adversary that will produce three ambrosia cakes per day, with special properties including the fact that until eaten they will remain fresh and untainted.

Alexander stepped out of his room wearing the rings and the clothes of his father that had adjusted to his size. He knew who he should have been, and with the experience of Angel he resolved to carry out the fight

Doyle and four spirits ceased conversation as Alexander stepped into the room, attired in leather and dark clothing, dog tags, amulet, and fatigues underneath, the imposing duster secluding torches, swords, revolvers, knives, and other weapons and accoutrements. The three rings of his heritage worn on his right hand, his hair was now tied back, and beard trimmed to a respectably short length. Placing the hat on his head, he turned to the others, waving them toward the door. "We'll only be fashionably late if we go now." Seeing the ghost of the former vampire, he added, "everyone, meet us in the convertible."

"Angel—" the early-twenties-looking teen began.

"—It wasn't your fault, Xander, "Angel interrupted. "And I get to move upward…and that's a good thing. My sister forgives me and so does your friend. I'm just sorry you have all of my memories of…that time…"

"I wanted into the fight, and I guess I am, big time," Alexander continued. "And…I'll take care of Buffy as best I can. My word on my family name," he said, showing his father's ring.

"You're…" the former master vampire gasped as he stepped back.

"The son. After I've trained and properly prepared myself, I intend to change my name accordingly to honor my parents. Now, let's go. The others are waiting…Ghost Formerly Known as Dead-Boy."

"Be nice, or I stick around to haunt you."

"You be nice, or I'll mention the Nair in your shower."

"True perfection requires proper grooming."

"And after two centuries, it's my turn because you still obviously weren't getting it right."

"Ouch, you win."

"Was there ever really any doubt?"


	4. Chapter 4

Xander(us) Quatro Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate character belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

Angel drove his convertible for what promised to be the last time, pulling into the donut shop parking lot. Xander noticed the former vampire was amazed at being out in the sun, reveling in driving slow with the top down. Looking back at Sarah as Jesse happily pointed out different things to the fascinated little ghost, Xander began to wonder if anything could be done to delay their departure, when he remembered Jesse's words. "Sarah and I are here until her brother says good-bye."

As the car emptied out, Xander handed money to Jesse and waved Kowalski and Angel over. "I was thinking…what if we delayed Angel's good-byes awhile?"

"What are you saying, Xander?" Angel asked.

"Well, if you don't say good-bye, which probably means not seeing Buffy," Xander pointed out, "you and Jesse could show Sarah more of the nice things before you go. Maybe help with the research, get a job…"

Hope dawned in Angel's eyes as he understood both the spoken and unspoken considerations. "What would we tell Buffy?" Angel asked. "She should at least be told about me. And we're bound to run into each other at some point."

"Not necessarily," Kowalski interrupted. "If we designate a certain part of Sunnydale as the Angel Zone, and keep Buffy out of it…we could give it a try. If it doesn't work out, the three of you will have had some extra time before moving on. They never said you HAD to say good-bye right away."

"Let's ask Jess and Sarah what they think," Xander pondered. "Maybe Sarah wants to see her mother rather than wait." The other two men nodded assent at this.

A few minutes later, Sarah came barreling out of the store, babbling about all of the donuts and sprinkles and wonderous machines as Jesse called for help as he precariously carried out a catering urn of coffee, and many boxes of treats.

Taking Jesse aside, Kowalski explained Xander's idea as they carefully packed the "donut run" into the front seat.

"Coolness, Sarge," the teen ghost approved, trying a donut, "but whatever Sarah wants…hey, no taste for ghost dudes?"

"That's Major, or Kowalski," the older ghost asserted. "I'm going to miss food, but being around might still be interesting."

Angel and Sarah came up, the little girl looking worried, "Um, I want to go see my mom, if that's okay, Jesse?"

"Sure short stuff I just found out we can't taste food, so after I've had a chance to talk to Willow, I'll be ready to go," Jesse replied.

Only forty-minutes late, but uncharacteristically calling ahead, the Xander Troupe headed to the library behind their new associate.

"X-Xander," Giles addressed as the darkly-clad Scooby moved gracefully through the door, "Ms. Calendar will be along…Ah, here she is." They turned to find the twenty-something gypsy beauty entering behind Xander and looking him up appreciatively.

"Wow!" the Computer Science teacher exclaimed, "that's certainly a new look for you Xander. How much of that hair is real?"

"All of it, actually," responded Xander, smirking as Willow, Buffy, and (strangely enough) Cordelia all made startled but equally favorable sounds from over at the table. Xander noticed Buffy's still-red eyes and gave her a sad smile and nod as he gestured the two adults toward the table.

"X-Xander, how are you doing this morning?" the librarian asked. "Your attire indicates we weren't sharing a mass-delusion, and the local newspaper," he gestures at the table, "is blaming last night's events as carry-over from a war involving LA drug gangs."

"Everything became even more real as I woke up after a night filled with less than happy dreams," Xander began, "but I have to caution all of you, especially Buffy, not to get to hopeful over what I'm going to reveal next, because I have guests who are only here until the good-byes are said…

"This morning I was visited by four spirits that had nothing to do with Christmas past or future," he revealed as they nodded. "One is here to train me in my new role, two others are here because Liam and I both failed family members. These two are here until the fourth spirit shows up to say his good-byes, and by showing up that alone might be enough for the Powers to declare a good-bye."

"Hey, Xander," Cordelia asked, surprisingly pleasant as she seemed lost looking at his hair and attire. "Who's this Liam?"

"Liam is the name Angel went by before his turning," Xander replied, staring into Buffy's teary eyes. "And he is the fourth spirit. He will not come in until the others have had a chance. Then the three will move on. Agreed?"

At the nods, and with Willow hugging an almost-happy Buffy, Xander brought them up to speed. As he brought them up to speed except for the identities, he called out to the hall, "Hey guys, come on in!"

Kowalski brought in the coffee as Sarah skipped over to Xander. The third spirit carried the boxes in front of his face to the table as Doyle brought up the rear sipping from a cup.

Boxes on the table, Willow looked up an nearly fainted as she received a smile and a "Hi, Wills" from a lost friend.

"Jesse! OhmigodisitreallyyouImissedyouandyouwereavampireandnowyou'rehereand—" she babbled until she'd raced around the table and buried her face into his chest, the rest muffled for another ten seconds before even she came up for air. Cordelia did faint and proved enough of a distraction that Buffy helped her recover as the reunion ensued, and introductions made, including Sarah. When Buffy heard this, she walked over to the little girl, who whispered something into her ear.

"I love your brother, too, Sarah," Buffy replied as the two hugged briefly. "I hope we can be friends even if I can't be with…Liam…anymore."

While Willow, Cordelia and Xander talked to Jesse, and said their farewells, on one side of the table, the "grown-ups" conversed on the other.

"H-how i-is it that you are, uhrmm, going to help?" Giles asked.

"Apparently," Kowalski contributed, "I'll provide special forces training to Xander, and I guess anyone he indicates, and since us spirits are solid, I can do most of whatever it is you do. So far, we don't seem to need sleep or food, so we're open to whatever direction the boss here provides. I don't know if spirits can really train the physical stuff due to minimal feeling, but maybe languages and errands?"

"Alexander's your boss," Ms. Calendar stated, eyebrow raised slightly.

"Sure is, darlin'" Doyle interrupted, sitting next to the gypsy beauty, "and if yer interested in signin' up we could discuss it over drinks?"

Sidling quickly but bemusedly away from Doyle and up against the now-manly Alexander, she notices the rings on the latter's hand.

"Are those what I think they are?" gasped the young woman quietly.

"Yes they are," Alexander whispered back, "And to know that is to admit what you are, so you will not speak of it to anyone without my permission. We will discuss this at some point in the near future." The computer teacher nodded, but didn't move away from the contact established with the young man, a fact noticed slightly uncomfortably by the young women in the room.

"Any way" Xander spoke to the group, louder, "the other thing is…no one…including the Watcher's Council, Giles…will learn of my change…but it will be reported that a new hunter passed through last night and dusted Angelus and Spike before meeting up with his team and moving on. We don't need an exorcist or 'recruiters' causing trouble. It's bad enough that I'm going to scramble around dealing with the affairs of my parents and uncle. Houses, bills, and such."

"Hey, Xaander," Doyle offered, "depending on what's involved, couldn't we just send in our spirit to get the forms, then put them back in. Who's to say anything if we 'ave the paperwork in place?"

"Yeah, treat it as an Op," Kowalski continued. "Depending on money, jobs, friends, and such, Doyle and I vaguely could pass at a glance as relations, and if we can hack into the computer records and forge a few signatures…replace the signature cards with ours…"

"Oh! I can handle the records!" Willow explained, excited at being hacker-girl again. "And we can electronically order updates sent out of City Hall to replace existing ones outside Sunnydale!"

"If you're willing to sell low I can get Daddy to let me buy 'em up and rent them back to you!" Cordelia exclaimed. "And then you can buy me dinner to thank me!"

"Thank you, I think, Cordelia," Xander replied somewhat confused.

"Hey, the princess has a good idea there, Xaander," Doyle spoke up. "She may be making a profit selling 'em off, but it'll bring you in some cash, and we can say your family skipped town without ya."

"Th-that's an excellent point, Mr. Doyle," Giles said, as 'Ripper' began picking up the thread of the conversation. "And then the utility and other traces will turn off, so only any insurance policies a-and extraneous outlays need concern us. We can disappear 'em right proper, eh?" he added with a smirk before clamping down to his usual demeanor at the looks the scoobies and Ms. Calendar gave him.

"Cool," Xander responded. "Can we get it done this weekend? Including my emancipation?"

"Xander," Willow said quietly as she came up to her friend while Jesse tried talking up Cordelia, "aren't you rushing things with your parents? They've only just…left."

"Wills," Xander responded privately, "the parents that raised me I don't miss for a second. The parents that left me a letter freely telling me they loved me, respected me and cared for me…understand what I need to do. They will always be in my heart, not the ones that took up space for my entire life." They hugged, and memories of Angel's observations on Willow's feelings caused him to kiss her forehead, and whisper so only she could hear. "Willow, I have a road to follow as dangerous as Buffy's. I don't know if I can or should risk real relationships…and I can't risk what we already have…So can we just stay Xander and Willow best friends and not worry about anything else?"

The red-headed girl looked up with glistening emerald eyes, and with a small bittersweet smile nodded, hugged him quickly, and moved to sit back down next to Buffy, as Jesse stood and declared himself ready.

"Liam, come in now!" Xander called out as Cordelia and Willow hugged Jesse and separated.

The former vampire came in, and Buffy rushed over to embrace him. The two moved off to the other side of the room, talking and looking teary-eyed as the expanded slayerettes made polite conversation until the inevitable departure.

Half and hour later, as Buffy and Angel embraced, the three faded to the next plane of existence, and Cordelia drove Willow and Buffy home.

The rest of the weekend flew by in a flurry of activity, record changing, clothes and grocery shopping, house cleaning and late Sunday evening, closing on the properties in question, furniture and all.

Leaving the lawyer's office for dinner with Xander, Cordelia was not only a property owner, but had actually gained some minor respect from her father through her "decisive action" in closing the deal…something completely new. Xander's "uncles" set off to deposit cashier checks for forty thousand clear after all other debts and obligations were considered. Miraculously, one Scooby plan had been carried out without major blips.

Dinner at an Italian place went uneventfully, Cordelia going on about the property deal and the clothes shopping they'd done earlier in the day to Xander's actual amusement…it was Cordelia in full speed ahead, not Queen C, mode. Dropping her off, he walked her to the door, where he shook the hand of her waiting father, and bid them good night.

Monday morning was the great test of the Sunnydale 'acceptance of the excuse and not the reality' way of thinking. Xander drove up and parked the thoroughly cleansed and detailed De Soto he'd retrieved from in front of Spike's warehouse on the way to the mall on Saturday. Waving money around resulted in the auto shop giving priority to the classic automobile, and he'd picked it up in time for closing on Sunday.

Xander's car and his dark but acceptable attire both attracted looks as he made his way to the office with a change of address form. Guys appreciated the car, while girls that had begun to notice him last week, now gawked as his muscles were highlighted by his clothes as much as he'd hidden his physique before under Hawaiian comfort. The long hair drew many comments, until nearly to his first period he was confronted by Larry and his cronies.

"Hey, Harris," Larry started in. "What's with the sissy hair and tight clothes, there somethin' you're not sharing?"

"Gee, Larry," Xander asked snidely. "You looking at guys, now? Happy much?"

"You calling me gay, Harris?" the jock shouted as he swung at Xander, who ducked out of the way before kicking Larry's feet out from under.

"Gosh, Larry," Xander continued, seriously, "my clothes shrunk, and I don't wear the loose shirts any more. Funny thing, you're the first to notice. As to my hair…it's a cultural thing. I'm…Romani. If you're done trying to make a pass at a GUY, I'll be going to class now."

The next few periods flew by as rumors of Larry's minor humiliation reinforced Xander's excuse for his apparent changes. With over two centuries to draw on, including a number of languages, History, French, English and even Biology went by quickly and without the need to nap. 'Who'd a-thought Dead-Boy was such an avid reader? Guess he couldn't brood all the time.'

Lunch time saw Xander meet up with the scoobs and Ms. Calendar in the Library. They engaged in small talk and tried to adjust to a new dynamic that included a ghost, super-Xander and Cordelia, who with her Cordettes burst into the Library.

"See, Harmony?" Cordelia told them in Queen C mode, "With proper shopping even Harris can be made pleasing to the eye. A skill that I have, and you don't. And I'll bet you your shopping allowance for a month, that in a week I can have Summers and Rosenberg at the same level."

"These losers, puh-lease," Harmony sneered, "I'll take that bet."

"Good. Now, shoo. I have to inform them how there lives are about to change," Cordelia went on, and continued pleasantly when the Cordettes had left the room. "Hi, all. What's new?"

"Other than threatening to turn us into Harmony clones?" Buffy scoffed as Willow glared.

"Harmony? Please," Cordelia snorted. "Though I'm expecting you to prove me right, you two sleeping have more brain activity then she does on her best day."

"How can you say that?" Willow asked, confused. "She's your friend."

"She wants to be my social rival, Willow," Cordelia said, looking into the red-head's eyes in all seriousness. "It's the popularity game we and our families have played all through school. Nothing more. If you spent an hour a day on clothes and appearance, you'd easily match any of 'em."

"Whoa…" Buffy responded, taken aback. "What've you done with Cordelia? You're way too scary real to be her."

"On the way home last night, Xander said he'd bet me another night out that I couldn't leave 'the mask' at the door of the Library," Cordelia smirked, leaning against him. "Since he's dropped his, I'm proving him wrong. Just don't expect it out there."

"I guess we'll be dining out soon, Cordy," Xander joked, slightly embarrassed at the surprise contact. "And if this likeable version of you sticks around, I'll have to resign as treasurer of the 'We Hate Cordelia' club." This caused Willow to look concerned, but nod slightly after he'd said this.

"So. This afternoon. You will drive Willow and Buffy to the mall," Cordelia ordered, getting up to leave. "Meet me at the main entrance at four, and bring your money. There are shoes crying out to be purchased. Bye"

"Everybody," Xander intoned, "The Elvis of Shopping has just left the building. Thank ya very much."

"Are we really going, Xander?" Willow asked in amazement, only to have Buffy cut her off.

"Will, it's shopping. Xander's buying. It's a chance to explore real shopping without pain to yourself, even with Cordelia." Buffy continued, "Besides, I haven't been shopping for real since LA, and if it turns Cordelia into a human for a while…it's not only worth it, it could be a sacred part of my slaying duties." And on that note, she dragged off Willow, Xander's hearing barely picking up references to looking good, his name, and taking a chance.

After staring at the Library doors for a minute and listening to the chuckles of Giles and Ms. Calendar, the youth turned to them and asked, "I'm thinking it wouldn't hurt to have you two along for the fun. What's a few thousand between friends?"

Ms Calendar immediately seized the opportunity as Giles nearly paled at the thought. Sauntering past the librarian on her way out, the teacher purposely doe-eyed him, "Come on, Rupert. For me?" Giles nodded, flustered as she left the room.

After a moment of contemplation, the librarian noticed Xander staring at him, waiting with a smirk. "I-is there anything else I can do for you, Alexander?"

"Actually, there is," the young man replied. "I don't want to get anybody's hopes up, but could you research raising the dead? Or that spell of Ethan's? We have the spirit here, and I can make him solid…"

"I-I don't know anything off-hand, Xander," the librarian contemplated, and without a body I've no idea where to even begin."

"Well," Xander responded, "I think Kowalski's buried somewhere in Colorado if we need his body." Then, even more seriously, "Giles, what do you know of ambrosia?"

"Do you mean from mythology, or that staple of American potlucks?" Giles smarted off.

Rolling his eyes and giving Giles a look, Xander waved him on.

"It was, I recall, the food of the gods, keeping them eternally young and vital," the older man lectured, "though earlier mythos seem to vary on this point, whether it was nectar or food, whether it bestowed godhood or simply immortality to mortals eating it. It was protected as priceless by the Olympians. Why do you ask?"

"Hmmm, nothing probably. Just thought that looking for something like it might give us some ideas. What would something like that do to a spirit-reanimated body or solid spirit?"

"W-well, I imagine that it would either destroy the body completely, or restore it to mortality. There's no telling, is there?"

"So, if such a thing were possible, it might act as a boost, but nothing enough to push one over into a divine state. But what if we cast Ethan's spell on Kowalski dressed in his own clothes? Could you look that up? I'll wear out the fatigues sooner or later, and if we can figure this out it'd be of the better. I'll see you later. Thanks, Giles."

The shopping experience was not as painful as he'd expected, and Xander spent the next few days rearranging his life, moving to a four bedroom home between the High School and the University. Xander, Doyle, Giles and Kowalski patrolled nightly with Buffy, The Major modifying patterns and making suggestions as though they were an all-human team as it in the long-term would keep Xander, Giles and Doyle alive longer. Buffy seemed a little edgy at the slow downs, but also grateful for the company after the loss of Angel.

School went well enough, homework completed before the last bell, even math, and group research focused on Ethan's spell, spirits and wishes for obvious recent reasons. Xander met a few times during the week with his friends at school, but Buffy seemed to be reliving old times with a transfer student, while Willow was left to Cordelia's tender devices whenever researching stopped. Dinner with Cordelia on Wednesday had brought him up to speed on gossip, and he'd learned that Buffy was going to a new club and all her friends were specifically invited by her old friend on Thursday. Some kind of theme club. Xander agreed, and had offered to pick up Willow and Cordelia in the De Soto so they could go together. Doyle and Kowalski planned to see a movie, and they agreed to meet up at the Library around eleven before patrolling.

Xander picked up Cordelia and Willow a couple minutes late, and they reached the club

around a quarter of seven to find two vampires watching the exit. Xander immediately drove up and over the curb, running into one as he braked. The other vampires, momentarily stunned by the intrusion, proved an easy target as Xander shot him with a super soaker through the open window..

"Hey, fangless," Xander taunted as he approached the wounded vampire, "here's my cover charge." The satisfying poof was echoed a second later as Willow and Cordelia both staked the car-crash vamp.

"Ladies," Xander began. "There are two more soakers in the car. Call Giles on his cell phone, then spray anybody trying to get out that seems toothy."

Charging in, Xander found Buffy hard-pressed as she was fighting off four minions but leaving the rest of the clientele to a group of twenty newly-turneds looking like they'd been taken from the streets or a shelter. Drusilla stood off to the side, Xander a blur as he charged at top speed into the room, knocking two fledglings aside to reach the slayer, spraying holy water over her opponents. Dusting two vampires quickly, Buffy yells over to Xander to handle the fledglings and save the stupid customers.

Xander, pulling out a revolver, charges off into the crowd, head-shooting seven fledglings in rapid succession, and squirting five more into leaving several teenagers alone to chase him instead.

For long minutes, Xander with only the sounds of activity indicating Buffy still in the fight near the doorway, managed to dust two more fledglings and drive off the other three into Buffy's waiting stakes.

Ten minutes after the fight started, silence embraces the club only to be interrupted by Buffy's screams for him from outside the front doors.

"Buffy! Wha—" the youth chokes, seeing Willow and Cordelia unconscious next to the car. "How?" he asked as the four fledglings push out of the club to escape into the night. Thinking quickly, he turns to the slayer, "Help me get them in the car, then go make sure the rest of the vamps are out of the club. Then go after those fledglings before they eat somebody. I'll get them to the hospital."

Nodding, Buffy runs into the establishment as Xander takes smelling salts from a small kit in his coat. Waving the ammonia scent under their noses, he brings them briefly around, then heads for the hospital."

Two hours later, the gang had gathered to see Cordelia and Willow released and medicated for killer headaches.

"I can't believe Ford would do something like that, Buffy," Willow commiserated. "He seemed really nice."

"Nice or not," Buffy sighed, "he got a dozen people hurt badly. It's a miracle no one was killed or turned."

"W-Why don't we call it a night? Ms. Calendar and I will drive Willow and Miss Chase home," Giles suggested. "Drusilla is not exactly balanced from what Xander told us, but with such losses, she's unlikely to be able to do much any time soon. Perhaps tomorrow we can come up with a strategy to get rid of her that won't cost us dearly."

"Okay, Giles, but I hope you haven't jinxed us," Xander sighed as they walked into the night.


	5. Chapter 5

Xander(us) Five Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate character belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for reviewing and feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

**Thursday, Nov 13th, SHS Library, Lunchtime**

"Well, Rupert, he seems to be coming along fine with his physical training," Kowalsky said, "and with the whole strength and speed thing going for him, I'm thinking of starting him on unarmed combat and knives by this weekend. He's been eager to start on swords and firearms, but I've held off."

"That's probably for the better until he has better awareness of what he can do without weapons," Giles agreed. "When you think he's ready, I do have some experience with swords and staves."

"Sounds like a plan. And I think having Doyle to suffer with him makes the difference, too," Kowalsky smiled. "On another note, what can we do about his grades? I think he's smarter than he believes, and it wouldn't hurt to balance out his experience beyond killing."

"I-I agree entirely with that sentiment," Giles agreed, then continued, "What are your non-combatant skills like? Perhaps if we have similar language or other experience we could concentrate on those areas with Alexander."

"Kind of an immersion?" the major asked. "Hmmm, I know Arabic, Farsi, French and Spanish, plus general electronics and communication equipment, and basic field medic. Everything else is combat related or classified."

"W-well that would mean French and basic medic experience between us," Giles pondered. "How are you with mathematics?"

"Hated it until I learned the practical applications…trajectories and such, why?"

"That area of study is perhaps his weakest point," Giles cited. "And if we can perhaps push him there, and show progress…"

"…then the confidence boost might carry over into even greater achievement in his fighting and other skills," Kowalsky finished. "But first we need to get rid of this crazy Drusilla to get his mind on the book learning."

"Will he be in after school?" Giles asked.

"Yeah, I have him coming in and studying here and trying to get ahead by a week in whatever studies he can. That way he can write his questions down and hand them to the teachers without feeling embarrassed."

"There's certainly something to be said for that. Also, he might pay greater attention."

"Doyle came up with it," Kowalsky conceded. "He used to teach grade school. He's mentioned to me that Xander should consider getting his GED as soon as possible. That way if the State allows it he can take electives without pressure if he wants to stay in school, or move on to community college a year early. Doyle doesn't seem to have a good opinion of the grades taught in Sunnydale beyond the 8th grade level."

"How is Mr. Doyle settling in?" Giles asked. "I haven't had much contact with him."

"He's training with the kid, and getting into shape as I said," Kowalsky relayed. "If he can get certified in the next month, he might be able to teach rather than substitute."

"Yes, that would be handy," Giles nodded, "certainly to provide justification for his being in the library after hours, and as cover income."

"Well, I gotta go Rupert," Kowalsky hurried as he noticed the time. "I have a few things to pick up for this evening's training. Bye."

"And a good afternoon to you, Major," Giles responded, returning to his tasks. 'Having another adult around does make it easier to remain sane, and enforcing a decent nightly training regimen is much easier now that Xander is participating.'

**Sunnydale High School Library, 6:30 PM**

A man in a suit with a briefcase is walking past a school building at a brisk, determined pace. A school custodian comes out a door with a trashcan.

"Can I help you?" the custodian asks.

"Rupert Giles! I need to see him!"

"Mr. Giles, uh, he's our librarian. Next building over, first door on your left." The custodian shakes his head at the man's brusqueness.

Philip continues at his brisk pace and finds the outside library door. He continues toward it, but stops in his tracks when he hears a twig

being crushed behind him and turns to look. He hears a moan, but sees

nothing and checks the other way again. Behind him he hears breathing

and turns back again, and sees a woman in the shadows.

"Oh, God!" he exclaims, slowly moving back in shock.

Slowly the dead and rotting woman walks towards him, eyes flashing

yellow briefly.

"Deidre?" Philip questions.

"Philip," the flat response comes..

Philip quickly backs up and doesn't see the curb behind him, tripping and falling down. Scrambling to his feet, he runs to the library door. He pounds on it and yanks at the doorknob, and races inside where Giles and Kowalsky are watching Buffy and Xander sparring so they know where to begin the young man's unarmed combat training.

"Help! Somebody, please!" Philip yells, entering the Library. "Rupert, Eyghon has Deidre. It's right behind me!"

The four dispense with the sparring and moved over to meet whatever threat has entered the library, Philip on the verge of a breakdown. Through the doors, Deidre slowly advances on him, barely taking note of the others.

Deidre heads in the direction of Philip and Giles, Buffy moving in front of the animated body. She kicks it in the chest, staggering it slightly. Xander picks up a wooden practice sword and leaps over the table and lands to the right of the creature. Buffy kicks at the demon again, but it grabs her leg and twists her over the counter. Xander stabs the demon in the heart two-handed, sweeps himself and the sword to the right at vampiric speed to behead the stunned demon. To the real surprise of the group he repeats it and is cutting half-way through the demon's torso before it turns to goo all over the floor, counter and Buffy, as with her Slayer reflexes catches the head as it turns gelatinous. Eyghon's form briefly materializes on the floor, then dusts.

"Ewwwww!" Buffy whines, then glares at the teen. "Xander…that is SO not right. These were my favorite tights."

"And I will SO help you out of them if you'd like," Xander returned, winking as she walked around to his side of the counter.

"W-e-e-l-l-l, Xander," Buffy breathily purred as he came closer, making Xander blush and back away. "No." Then in a normal voice as she grabbed her gym bag, "but you're buying me dinner."

Xander "eeeped" as the others chuckled both at his expense, and as tension released after the demon gooped and dusted.

Jenny, Willow and Doyle arrived to find Buffy drying her hair and Xander finishing clean-up detail. Giles and Philip had tried to wave off the demon as a private manner, but Xander had quashed that idea by using his vampiric strength and speed to cage them.

"You two ready to talk, Rupert," the major asked. "Everyone's here and the kid ain't likely to let you out soon otherwise."

"I-I suppose now that the danger is removed," Giles replies as Philip nods. The scoobs unlocked the cage and are told part of the misspent tale of 'Ripper' Giles and the unfortunate mess that was Eyghon, "I was twenty-one, studying history at Oxford. And, of course, the occult by night. I hated it. The tedious grind of study, the... overwhelming pressure of my destiny. I dropped out, I went to London... I fell in with the worst crowd that would have me. We practiced magicks. Small stuff for pleasure or gain. And Ethan and I discovered something... bigger. Yes. One of us would, um... go into a deep sleep, and the others would, uh, summon him. It was an extraordinary high! God, we were fools. One of us, Randall, he lost control. Eyghon took him whole. We tried to exorcise the demon from Randall, but it killed him. No. We killed him. We thought we were free of the demon after that. But he came back. A-and I suppose that leaves only us, and I presume Ethan, alive. We were stupidly short-sighted, a-and that's why I stress proper preparation and control in what we do. I am sorry how this turned out."

"So," Buffy responds, placing her hand on the forearm of her Watcher, "after all this time, we finally find out that we do have something in common. Which, apart from being a little weird, is kind of okay."

"Yeah, hey, G-Man," Xander says, a thoughtful frown on his face. "Is this the same Ethan that caused our Halloween experiences?

"Yes," Giles replies, "I'm afraid it is, why?"

"Well, other than thanking him before I beat him slowly to death," Xander continues without humor, "if this means he's still kicking around Sunnydale, I want to nab him for a Halloween repeat."

"I'll second the beating," Buffy growled almost hungrily. "That bastard killed Angel and a lot of others. Human or not, he has it coming."

"Uhhhhm, uh, Xander," Giles began as he stepped back from his predatory, slayer, "for what purpose would you wish the hated Mr. Rayne to repeat his spell?"

"I was just wondering…if we dressed the Chuckster in his fatigues, would he become human again?" Xander proposed. "Also, I'd like to see what other divinely-dependent magic is in that book of his. Can we re-soul a vampire? Can we then do the Halloween spell again to make them human? And…is there a spell to remove the memories of Angelus' kills…I haven't slept well for two weeks."

"Oh…Xan," Willow nearly cried as her and Buffy moved to comfort their friend, the latter losing her anger for the moment.

"I-I understand, and we'll see what we can do" Giles assured the teenagers, "but that presupposes his presence in town."

"And I sure wouldn't mind being alive again," Kowalsky added. "Would we need my…body? I think it'd be in Colorado somewhere."

"I-I don't really know," Giles admitted, "Philip?"

"I'm afraid I don't know, either," the rescued man conceded, "but I'm certainly willing to help research."

Doyle frowned and spoke up from his perch on the table corner. "How 'bout we do a patrol to look for 'im? After all, if he's involved in all this, it wouldn't hurt to look around."

"Count me in for that! I want him to bleed!" Buffy agreed as she outfitted herself for patrol, looking up to catch the eyes upon her. Begrudgingly adding, "after the mojo first, I know."

"W-well, then," Giles considered, "Major, would you please organize a sweep of the town while Philip and I discuss matters here?"

"Certainly. Any preferences, Xander?" he asked his inexperienced boss as a leadership exercise. "Maybe two teams?"

"Sounds good. How about Buffy, Doyle and Willow in one team," he started, "and you, me and Ms. Calendar in the other?"

"Sounds like a plan," the veteran responded. "Okay, everybody, arm up. Doyle, take the tranquilizer gun with you. Let's go. Xander, how about we start at the shop, then swing toward the industrial area and back? Buffy, if that's alright, how about you swing through your neighborhood, then the Bronze and retail area before meeting us back here, say in two hours?"

Sure, why are you uys getting the shop?" she asked curiously rather than suspiciously."

"Oh, that's the area I know best from patrols," the major replied, hand pressing the door open. "I'll be better able to tell if something's out of the ordinary as we look"

"Okay, see you later…" she trailed off, making sure Willow had her anti-vamp kit ready.

As Team Xander left, they heard Doyle ask, "So, Red, do ya think they'll let us in the power costume thing if it works?

Nearing the costume shop, Xander and Jenny pulled up as Kowalsky stepped just into the mouth of a dark alley.

"What's up, Major?" Jenny asked, "Something in the alley?"

"No," he replied, gesturing them into the alley out of view from passers-by. "Just two things, though. First, Xan, how much of my fatigues do you have on?"

"Only the tags and the t-shirt, why?"

"If you take 'em off, I'll do some invisible recon of the shop."

"Okay, sounds smart," Xander nodded, starting to remove the items only somewhat bashfully. "What's the second thing?"

"I want to know what's between you two? I noticed it when we first showed up with Angel and his sis, and she's been slightly hesitant since."

Jenny looked decidedly uncomfortable as Xander was removing his shirt. "Go ahead and tell the Major what I am as you know it from your perspective, Jenny."

"Well," she started with an exhale, looking around for eavesdroppers. "He is through his mother the sole survivor of House Valerious, the Heir to leadership of the Romany. The reason even our own people laugh at everyone claiming to be our kings, is that the only person closer than five generations of blood, is Alexander, who was confirmed at his birth by the Elders of the Tribes, and through his father's line confirmed Prince by the Elders of the Garoun. His lineage fought invaders of the homeland for two centuries, and then the darkness for over for three centuries more throughout Europe until with his parents he disappeared over a century to go."

"Wow," Kowalsky reacted. "Does that mean we're going to get some gypsy muscle backing us up?"

"I've asked her to keep quiet for now," Xander interrupted, redressed. "Once we figure out what our plan is, then we'll figure out how to plug everybody in if they want. Also, I have memories of less than sterling quality regarding the Watcher's, so Giles' folks don't know yet, either."

"Okay, I guess," Kowalsky replied. "That it?"

"Well, depending on how you look at it," Xander sighed melodramatically, "I'm either way too old for her, or way too young." He walked back to the mouth of the alley, ignoring the snickering ghost and stunned gypsy woman.

**Friday Morning (November 14th)**

Buffy and Willow are sitting on a bench, Buffy speaking, "I'm on a beach, but not one of those American beaches, one of those island beaches where the water's way too blue, and I'm laying on my towel, and it's just before sunset, and Gavin Rossdale's massaging my feet!"

"Oh, that's good! Uh, I'm in Florence, Italy, I've rented a scooter that's parked outside, and I'm in a little restaurant eating ziti, and there are no more tables left, so they have to seat this guy with me, and it's John Cusack!"

"Ooo! Very impressive. You have such an eye for detail."

"'Cause with the ziti!" Willow smiles as Xander shows up.

"What are you two up to?" the dark teen asks.

"Just having a quick game of 'Anywhere But Here'."

"Ooohhh," Xander responded. "A redhead, a blonde and a fully-stocked beach house for the week."

"What happened to Amy Yip at the waterslide park?" Willow asked.

"Fulfilled that one last Saturday when The Major had me swimming and climbing and stuff," Xander smirked. "Amy Yip at the waterslide park!"

Willow, looking troubled, "Spill mister."

"Well, I'd just climbed up the side wall of the tower as the major asked, then slid down. When I got to the bottom, Amy Yip and a few other gals asked me over for pizza and sodas. That's all. Other than the fact that they're the ones to braid my hair."

"That's where that came from," Buffy accused. "You could have asked us."

"Yes, but with them it was a pleasant diversion," Xander joked, then added flirtatiously, "but with a certain redhead and blonde it would have been too much even for me to handle."

Xander left the two happily laughing friends and headed in to class.

**SHS Hallway**

"So, what's on tap tonight that's so important?" Buffy prodded. "Uprising, prophesied ritual, preordained deathfest?"

"Um, noting quite so exciting, I'm afraid," Giles replied. "a medical transport is delivering the monthly supply of blood to the hospital."

"Mm. Vampire Meals-On-Wheels," Buffy grimaced, Willow nodding agreement.

"Hopefully not," he responded.. "Uh, with Xander and the Major leaving this afternoon for Colorado Springs, we'll meet outside the hospital at 8:30

sharp. I'll bring the weaponry."

"I'll bring the party mix!" Buffy joked.

"Just don't be late," Giles sighed. "I do not relish leaving Ethan singly guarded for any length of time, even if we do have him tranquilized."

"Have I ever let you down?" Buffy asked, straight-faced.

"Do you want me to answer that, or shall I just glare?"

**Private Airfield Colorado Springs Area 9:30 PM**

"Okay, gentlemen, we'll be ready at 0230 for the return charter," confirmed the pilot. "The keys to your vehicle are on the front seat."

The 40 minutes around the back route to the cemetery proved uneventful, with no one obvious following them. Having had Willow hack into various databases led to the location of Kowalsky's grave, luckily a little off the beaten path. Surprising to Kawalsky, relatively recent flowers and a pair of nice cigars lay next to his marker. 'Thanks, Jack. Someday I hope to meet up with you again…in the flesh.' Looking nearby, Kawalsky pulled out a flashlight and pointed it at the very recent grave marker just a little way from his own. It shook him up a bit. 'Dammit, Daniel. I guess the Snakes finally got you. Rest in peace you crazy rock digger. Put in the word, huh?'

Getting control of himself as Xander waited for his new friend to recover from an apparent loss, the two men were able to sneak into the shed and accomplish their task in an hour and cover the hole back up.

On the way back, Kowalsky asked, and Xander agreed, that they could at least drive by the houses of his friends Ferretti and O'Neill. Ferretti's house was dark, and the truck wasn't present; probably meant that he was away on mission or out of town. The two of them raided the house for a few sets of fatigues, and grabbing his address book for information on others. Jack's place had a large number of cars; considering that Daniel's marker had been freshly emplaced, this was probably the wake. Looking for just a few moments, the major gave directions to Captain Carter's place, where they found not only similar items, but also some of Daniel's journals and papers. Kowalsky paused only for just a moment, grabbed an armful and then left, they drove to Kowalsky's old locker. Jumping the fence, the major determined that his paid in advance paranoia had paid off. He proceeded to override the security and within the hour had loaded up a small arsenal for relocation to 'Hell Gate Command' in Sunnydale. 'Maybe I can convince the kids to form up as HG-1 and HG-2?' he snickered to himself.

Bittersweet, bodied and beweaponed, the two fighters made it back to Sunnydale uneventfully.

**SHS Library, Saturday Morning 0900 hours**

A very tired Xander Harris wheeled in Kowalsky's body after stopping at the house for a couple of items to find everything ready for the spell.

"Giles, can you run us through this again?" Xander asked. "I'm running low on energy and need to make sure of some things."

"Oh, of course, Xander," Giles replied. "First, we'll open the box and have Charles step into his body. Second, Ethan will raise him as a zombie. Next, Charles will place his fatigues over whatever he has on, while Mr. Doyle will assume those he has been provided. Fourth, Ethan will cast his chaos spell. However, this much magic, even drawing directly from the Hellmouth below the Circle is quite fatiguing. The drain on the caster is too great. Tomorrow night we'll cast the memory restoration spell, then as per agreement Ethan will be freed to leave town permanently."

"I might be able to reenergize Ethan," Xander sighed, "and perhaps ensure Kowalsky's transformation back to human. My…mother left me a few gifts before she left, and it should do the job. Don't ask."

"V-very well, then" Giles begrudged slightly, "Ethan will that be a problem for you?"

"Not really, Ripper, " the chaos mage allowed, "but I'll have to find another Being upon whom to call, we can't simply assembly line divine favors."

Xander paced in thought, turning to the still-caged troublemaker. However, Giles came up with an alternate first. "You will invoke, Hecate, instead of Janus. She, after all, is very much associated with the types of magic we're casting today. I've sent Doyle out to the magic shop for vials of snake, dog and horse blood as additional sacrifices to be flash-matched at the last word of your spell. K-keep in mind that in this instance, falsehood on y-your part will result in your death."

About two hours later had the gathered group in one place, the ceremony proceeding. When the zombie spell reanimated Kowalsky into flesh, Xander tossed a twinkie to the major, nodding that he should eat it. The corpse began to glow as he consumed the cake, even as a wave of magic reverberated throughout the building at the conclusion of Rayne's costume spell.

"I'm human again," Charles Kowalsky began. "And I'm me. No extras. Hot damn! Now what?"

"Charlie!" Doyle/Ferretti gasped, stunned as he looked at his deceased friend move around, "Wha—" He staggered and passed out as Xander tranquilized him. Turning to face Rayne, Xander cocked aquestioning eyebrow.

"Just wait a minute, as that's what I asked of Janus," the mage directed. "I believe Mr. Harr—" He stopped talking as a snack cake cake began to glow as it was handed to him in the magic Circle. Eating it, Rayne felt more energy and well-being than he had since his youth with Ripper and the lot.

"What is this, young man?"

"Family recipe," Xander allowed as they watched Kowalsky slump a little, eat a second cake he'd been handed, and similarly declare himself alive and reenergized. "Let's get on with the last of it magic guy. Then you can leave town."

Grimacing slightly at being ordered around, nevertheless the chaos magic was reinvoked, this time through Hecate. Xander, Kowalsky and Doyle prepared themselves quietly in the Circle. The rush of memories forgotten and assumed rushed through their consciousness, good with the bad, and near-eidetically re-experiencing their gifts. Screaming, they passed out.

**Cheyenne Mountain, Same Time**

Lou Ferretti briefly fainted, coming to hours later they had a recollection of seeing the deceased Major Kowlasky, a dark-haired youth looking confused, and an older man wearing tweed pointing a rifle at them.

**SHS Library 1:30 PM**

Xander remained immobile as he regained consciousness, hearing the others recovered and discussing various topics. Xander considered what he could and could not do, meditated as he felt his body's expanded capability from the old Xander. Unlike the stresses and tragedy of the first possession, the magics this time had worked to a far greater extent since he was inadvertently wearing many of the same items, plus a few of the gifts of his parents. Xander now fully possessed the knowledge and skills his wish had demanded, and because of the familial rings that jogged his memory, he could now draw upon the mortal experiences of his parents in fighting the Darkness. Now he realized that in months instead of years, training would bring forth skills and capabilities he'd only begun to realize, and had the family and comrades necessary. 'Soon, Drusilla, you will join Spike and Angelus in Hell.'


	6. Chapter 6

Xander(us) Act: Six Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

**Friday, December 12th, 6:30 PM**

Xander thought back over the weeks since Ethan was sent from town. Training and school had become all-consuming, Xander avoiding the Scoobies as much as possible once Kendra's Watcher Sam N'Butu arrived in Sunnydale. The two had left a few nights ago, and he planned on nest-clearing during the Christmas Break now that the coast was clear.

Kendra, now there's a girl way too committed to the fight; nothing to live for except the next evil to eradicate. Nice, pleasant…pretty… exotic…and that accent. 'Whoa, don't go there Xan-Man…that way lies trouble.' Getting his mind back on his current mission representative the culmination of nearly four weeks of effort, both hunting and intelligence. Tonight they were raiding the vamp boss of Santa Barbara and much of this section of California. Kowalsky's intel had shown it to be a combination business meeting and dance, the latter at which everyone's date would become dinner. Armed with bullets and daggers dipped in blessed silver, super-soakers and some holy water canisters, the three of them had followed three female minions and gotten themselves picked up as 'dates.'

Standing at the entrance of the mansion's ballroom, they allowed the three junior vampiresses to precede them. This gave them enough time for Xander to let two wooden daggers drop down his sleeves. As he drove home two strikes to two unbeating hearts, he also heard the satisfying dusting of the guards. Surprised, the vampires and a few nearby undead only had time to gawk as Doyle and Kowalsky threw canisters toward the main clusters.

Humans screamed in panic and vampires in acid-burning pain as the holy-water mist sprayed throughout the crowd. Xander drew one of his soakers in place of a dagger, then charged into the thick of it, heading for the vamp boss.

Ten minutes of chaos ensued as humans got in the way of vampires, the press of the crowd too thick for the undead to make any real progress before their now balaclava-clad attackers struck home. As the entrance was the only exit, humans herded themselves away from the conflict as the vampires repeatedly poofed. Thirty vampires dusted. Only thirty slightly bruised and bumped humans, some tipsy as well as frightened, awaiting their possible end.

"Okay," Kowalsky began in his best 'Major's' voice, "is there anyone here from law enforcement? Our intent is not to harm, as at least some of you saw what those things were."

A moment, then some shuffling, and a man in his mid-thirties stepped forward. "I'm James Morton, the Deputy Mayor. What are your demands?"

"No demands," Kowlasky began. "Just want to point out that if you do call the police, are you really going to tell them three guys killed thirty vampires? That they used wooden knives and squirt guns and you didn't stop us? Now, I want you all to simply face the wall there for the next hour. We're going to check for any vamps hiding out. Then we will leave. Then you all go home, wake up tomorrow and forget tonight ever happened."

The crowd, almost as one, shuffled around and kept quiet, and did as they were told.

**Saturday, December 13th**

Back in Sunnydale six hours later, after raiding a known workplace run by the now-dusted vampire boss, a tired trio inventoried their loot and turned to the task of sorting through the paperwork, checked coats unclaimed by the guests, and waited for Willow and Giles to visit them later that day.

"T-Thirty vampires?" Giles asked, incredulously. "I-I find that very difficult to accept…not that I don't believe you."

"They were pretty much packed in against each other and their…food, Rupert," Doyle remarked. "With us spraying their faces with the holy water, Xaander's extra speed made it easy to get to 'em nicely. "

"Fascinating," Giles replied, "A-and where are these papers you'd like me to examine?" Doyle handed them over as Kowalsky sipped the double espresso the kid had bought on the way over. 'Still can't believe what they charge for this, but as the kid…boss…no, let's call him Colonel…maybe that 'll stop the kid part after all the dusting last night…as Colonel Xander' Suddenly Kowalsky snickered and nearly spat out coffee as others looked over questioningly. "I was just musing on the fact that for what we're paying for the coffee, it should be at least as thick as what I got used to in Turkey or Saudi. And that as Colonel Xanders says, at least the demon vamps are paying the demon prices."

"Colonel Xanders, eh Charley, that's quite good," Doyle remarked. "Having seen 'im trying to dance at clubs, I definitely see a chicken connection." Xander looked at Giles for help, rolling his eyes.

"You'll find no sympathy from G-Man." Giles smirked. "and on a more serious venue, it appears from a brief perusal of the documents from your 'business trip' that a certain Russell Winters is at least a guiding hand in vampiric criminal and semi-criminal activity from Beverley Hills to San Simeon, especially in entertainment establishments and the like."

"So if we decide to hit him," Xander pondered, "it should be before he has a chance to increase protection. Major, what do you think?"

"Well, I don't--" Doyle began, then looked embarrassed. "Sorry, Lou's memories have become quite comfortable since we began the training…"

"That's okay, Doyle," Kowalsky responded. "You already had his tendency to inhabit sports bars even before the Ethan thing, so if you'd have joined up, you'da fit in with the team pretty good. And besides, 'the colonel' here won't demote you. And—" He stopped as Doyle clutched his head and cried out at the migraine hot with a slow kaleidoscope of visions."

"Francis," Kowalsky pressed, as Giles fetched a glass of water and Xander handed over one of his special twinkies. "Is it one of those vision things you told us about?"

"Yeah, I thought I was free of the bloody things," Doyle winced. "But I guess the 'Powers' decided to express an opinion on what we're discussing." Sipping his water, and recovered from pain thanks to the twinkie, Doyle continued, "Well, I saw a girl being drained by a rich-looking vampire, I saw the address in the papers in Rupert's hand, and I saw Monday's LA Times talking about a girl being found burnt up in a car wreck Sunday evening. I think it must be the same one."

"Well, I would guess they would like you to foil this Winters' intentions for the girl," Giles offered. "A-and it behooves you to save her since it coincides with your panned actions…only a little faster."

"I hear that," the once and again seer complained. "And after seein' what he does to the girl, I want to rip into him myself, Powers or no."

"Hey, 'Colonel'," Kowalsky slowly introduced. "These Powers may not be our friends, but if they simply feel the need to 'request' from choices we are considering…"

"T-That's definitely a consideration, Xander," Giles added. "I-I understand your reasons for not accepting entrance into their service, but the extra warning…"

"And if you keep feedin' me these snack cakes that make the pain go away fast, we can give it a chance," Doyle added. "Though if we run into 'em anytime soon, I'd like to avoid the whole pain part of it."

The three men paused as a throat clearing brought them from their meeting as an uninvited voice interrupted. "If you just eat one of those cakes every morning, you'll just feel a tiny pressure inst—" Whistler choked off as Xander grabbed the height-challenged balance demon and held him with feet dangling.

"From now on, if you're going to interfere," Xander stated, annoyed, "You will knock on the door and wait to be let in, got it?" Whistler nodded and was released. Allowed to continue, he did.

"If you eat one of the kid's magic treats, you'll only feel pressure that a vision is coming, and you'll also be energized to maximum capability."

"And you'll only request and not expect?" Kowalsky asked. "No screwing around or keeping score on us?"

"No. After our last…meetin' the Powers decided to leave the kid alone that way," the minion of the Powers conceded. "And his mother had an audience with the Creator that confirmed this."

"And what about your remark to Giles?" Xander asked quietly.

"You heard that?" Whistler said, expressing shock. "You do have the full package, huh?"

"You threatened my friends," Xander nearly growled, however softly. "That and what they did to my family…"

"Hey kid, it wasn't me…" the pimp-dressed demon demurred. "A-and if you just cut us some slack and work with the Powers, not for them… no score on friends that don't go over to the other team. They either just stay out of it or try their best and it'll be enough. Deal?"

Xander looked over at his mentor-father figure and the two men that had become brothers and mentors to him, and at their nods, responded. "No official deal as such…but we'll go on that basis for now. I still don't trust, but we'll give it a shot. And slow down the vision a bit, Doyle once said it's hard to really keep track. And you show up every month as a contact. If they let you answer questions fine. If not, at least we'll vent and not be too pissed at them. Okay?"

Pausing as if listening to someone, Whistler after a moment responded, "Agreed. Anything before I go?"

"Y-Yes," Giles asked. "Why did you choose to send a vision now?"

"Two reasons, and I don't send them," Whistler answered, starting to head for the door. "This was the first chance that they thought you might be open to an approach, and Angel was due to go after Winters two years from now to fulfill his destiny. The Powers still want that stuff fulfilled, even if youse are a free agent…" And with that he was gone, Willow coming in a few minutes later. "Hey guys? Sorry I'm late. Did I miss anything?"

Two hours later found Willow and Xander at the new mini-golf course. Joyce had been seeing a computer software salesman named Ted for a couple of weeks, and had invited them out as a way of general introduction. Xander felt slightly relaxed after a picnic lunch, but also felt a little off somehow. He dismissed it as six weeks of training, fighting and nightmares. For Joyce and Buffy's sake, he was being sociable, and found it was easier than he'd thought, though there was something about Ted that just wasn't registering.

"Ah, the dreaded five-par cuckoo clock. Ha!" he mocked jokingly. "So many have come, so few have conquered," He puts his ball in place and studies his shot.

"That picnic was delicious." Joyce complimented. "You know how rare it is to find a man that cooks?

"I know I've been looking a long time for one," Ted joked. "So, Buffy, I bet the boys are lined up around the block tryin' to get a date with you."

"Not really," she responded non-committally, but glancing at Xander.

"Oh, they are, but she's only interested in...uh, her studies! 'Book-cracker Buffy', it's kind of her nickname these days." Willow remarked, catching herself.

"Well, glad to hear it," Ted nodded, bending down to position his ball for his shot. "I bet that means your grades will be picking up soon."

"My grades?" she replied, suspiciously, walking over to her mother. "How does he know about my grades?"

"I told him," Joyce replied. "He wants to know everything about you. He's concerned. That's a good thing…Ooo, nice shot, Ted!"

At the next hole, with a castle fixture, Buffy readies her shot as Ted coaches. "Keep your eye on the ball. Watch those elbows!"

Buffy swings a bit too hard, and the ball ricochets off of the castle

and into the rough behind it. Ted comments, too happily, "Oh! Bad luck, little lady!"

Buffy starts to walk to retrieve her ball for another try, Joyce taking pity, "Oh, we won't count it."

"We won't?" Ted asks, a little put out causing Buffy to stop and turn back to look at them.

"Well, it's just miniature golf, Ted" Joyce demurred.

"It is, but the rules are the rules. And what we teach her is what she takes out into the world when we're not there, whether it's at school or an unchaperoned party," Ted asserts, then turns to Buffy. "I don't mean to overstep my bounds, this is between you and your mother, I just think right is right."

"He has a point," Joyce sighed.

"Fine. I'll just go hit my ball from the rough," Buffy replies half-heartedly, going over to her ball behind the castle and picks it up. She steps onto the green, and thinking no one sees her drops her ball into the hole, yelling out, "Hey, how 'bout that! Got a hole in two!"

"Beg to differ," Ted stated, Buffy turning her head to see him standing next to the castle where he can just see.

"Okay, so fine my score or whatever," she exhales.

"I think you're missing the point here, little lady," Ted goes on. "Right is

right, wrong is wrong. Why don't people see that?"

"It's just a game?" Buffy responds, annoyed.

"Right, it's just a game, do your own thing, well, I'm not wired

that way," Ted overreacts, starting to tap his ankle very hard. "And I am here to tell you it is not a game! It does count, and I don't stand for that kind of malarkey in my house!"

"Then I guess it's a good thing I'm not in your house," Buffy retorts.

"Do you want me to slap that smart-ass mouth of yours?" Ted threatens, getting closer as Buffy is stunned, not believing her ears as she notices Xander and the others come around the castle, and Ted follows her gaze.

"Who's up for dessert? I made chocolate-chip cookies!" Ted diverts, smiling. Joyce opens the zip-lock bag of cookies as Xander walks up to Ted.

"Cookies are good, Ted," Xander loomed. "But if you ever threaten to hit Buffy, for any reason, you'll get more than a slapping. Understand?"

"Hey!" Ted exclaimed, then smiled. "Just a little misunderstanding. I overreacted, I admit it. I'm not used to young people, that's all." Turning to Buffy, "I'm very sorry, Buffy. I overreacted, give me another chance?"

Buffy, looking at her mom and see a little pleading in her eyes, nodded. "Okay, but regardless of what happens between you and my mom, you stay out of my life."

"Fair, enough," the salesman smiled. "How about some more cookies?"

The rest of the experience was painless.

Xander awoke to the sound of his alarm around 8:30PM. Catching a quick shower before outfitting, he grabbed the cakes from the cornucopia, and headed into the front room to find his two comrades suited up.

"What's the sitch, Major D?" he asked Doyle with a smirk. "any changes to tonight's plan?"

"Original recipe, Colonel," replied Doyle, rolling his eyes. "Everything's the same."

"Ah, good," Xander nodded, grabbing a travel mug of coffee, then indicated the cakes to the others. "Here's our nightly snack. I'm thinking if the Powers are getting involved, we should just plan on a daily addition to the vitamins and such you two have us chomping down."

"They're good for you," Kowalsky countered, biting into a cake and washing it down with his own cup of java. "What's the deal with these things anyhow? Come clean."

"Well," Xander began, frowning at how to reveal the least 411 about his family. "You ever read ancient mythology? Ambrosia and such?"

"Yeah, for reasons we can't go into," Kowalsky replied. "But isn't that supposed to make you a god or something?"

"Yeah, but there really isn't any ambrosia any more," Xander continued. "But the last things placed in this…just to hold it…was ambrosia. Along with the fact that the previous owner had used it to produce a very strong restorative draught favored by the Titans…did I just use the words restorative and draught?" They nodded both amused, though waving him on. "So even though technically ambrosia isn't really being created for us, it's really boosting the Titan drink, causing the beery slush to become a bready cake…and giving us many of the benefits a Titan would receive…basically maximum us…and maybe unaging. I don't really know, though if we wait to take it after a wound, it's like an instant healing, being restorative. That's all I know."

"Wow, either super vitamins or super first aid," Kowalsky considered. "Tough call. What's your feeling on it…Major D?"

"Hey," Doyle smiled at the nickname. "How 'bout we merely mortals take them before each mission, and I'll keep one to break off a piece for vision headaches. Xander seems not to need it as much, with the strength and all, so we can keep it back to build up a reserve until we know different, eh?"

"Sounds like a good plan," Xander responded, nodding. "I'll grab a few from my room and we'll head out. Majors, you two drive. I'm going to sleep in the backseat. Oh, Giles and Jenny wanted to ride along to see how we're working out, so swing by his place on the way out. And for now, let's keep the cake info to ourselves until I'm more comfortable and have sorted through my memories better."

**Early Sunday, December 14th**

Four hours later they left the mansion of the vampire formerly known as Russell Winters, loaded up with information and valuables. It had been an extremely simple mission, and they'd not pushed things by staying too long. Pulling into Helen's Diner in LA proper, they'd just ordered a late dinner when Doyle winced and zoned out for a moment, hand to temple.

"There are some kids fightin 'off vampires nearby, a bunch of 'em," the seer reported. "I think we'll need to make supper 'to go.' Anybody have a map? I have street signs but I don't know where we need to go." By the time they'd bought a map and paid for their dinners at the register, food was ready and they had a location, only two blocks away as it turned out.

"Gee, Rupert," Jenny cooed as they climbed into the vehicles, "not exactly the most boring date we've had, but next time I think we'll dance with each other instead of the vampires?"

"Err, certainly," he responded, recovering as they pulled quickly from the parking space, enough to smirk, "And perhaps if you're a really good date, w-we can have dinner in a restaurant instead of the car."

"Oh, Rupert, you know how to treat a girl," the gypsy replied sultrily, "though that would put the back seat of the car further away."

"Hey!" Xander exclaimed chidingly from the back seat, "just make sure I'm elsewhere at the time, okay?"

"Oh, urhm, w-we're here," Giles cut in, embarrassed. Getting out of the vehicle, but not immediately noting anything, they paused as the other two members of their grouped joined them. Xander, looking as though he heard something, raced to the end of a nearby alley way. Xander took in the scene before him as the others caught up, figuring out the best way to help the four teens barely holding off eight minions and a vampire leader. Turning to 'the majors' and the 'teachers' he whispers, "the normal one two two?" At their acknowledgement of the Xander, Majors, Support Pair formation, their lead-man draws out a sword and runs at full speed into the alley.

The vampire leader was swearing at his minions to finish the job so that they could head back to the lair. "We already have four for Knox, with these two—Ahhhhh!" he screamed, having turned as he'd just heard a disturbance behind him. His right arm dusted away as a sword pierced into his torso, shocking him into unconsciousness.

The minions, caught off-guard by the scream from behind, turned almost as one to see the slash of a sword and a dark figure charging through their middle ranks. Two more of their kind disintegrated as the undead divided into two unsure groupings, to hear the shouts of two human fighters and the reports of handguns as two more ceased existence.

The teens, meanwhile, had leapt at their attackers with crosses and sharpened gardening stakes, causing pain to one of their tormentors while poofing another. The remaining vampires sought refuge in escape, racing around Doyle as he opened fire with his 45 into their ranks, Xander rendering the wounded vampire team leader unconscious.

Jenny, and Rupert super-soakered the wounded and desperate vampires as the majors both switched to hand to hand combat. Xander turned to face the teens, the last of the vampires fell to a final death.

"Yo man, thanks for the assist," a well-toned and well-spoken black teen offered in the way of greeting. "Why'd you leave the other one alive?"

"Assist?" Xander smiled with an eyebrow cocked.

"You didn't see the other six dust piles left by the folks we were trying to help?" the black teen leader responded. Looking at Xander he made a gesture at the downed vampire.

"I overheard it saying something about them already having two, so I'm planning to find and rescue them," Xander answered. Turning to face the rescued group, "You don't seem too surprised about the vampires."

"They've been hunting us for years, but we've started to organize and fight back recently," the young man replied. "I'm Gunn, by the way."

Xander nodded, but remembered the lessons on operational security drummed into him by Giles and the majors, who were dusting off and approaching, "We're…Los Infierneros..." Xander stopped as he saw the faces of two wounded companions of the four teens being helped by Gunn's crew. He turned to Doyle and Jenny, "You two go grab the patch kits from the car and cell the paramedics. Kendra and N'Butu are hurt…"

Xander eased his way between two teens, checking Kendra's pulse and body temperature, the former absent and the latter falling. "G-Man, help me with CPR. Major, please check on N'Butu. Mr. Gunn, smack the camp in the head if it wakes up. I still want to question it."

Ten minutes of struggle, and the sound of two vamp-smackdowns later, the Watcher and Slayer were breathing and alive, both having died and come back again. Xander smirked, relieved, then getting up to work out frustration on the vampire "Lady J, when's that ambulance due?"

"About three or four minutes, 'Colonel,'" she replied. "Shall we try to carry them to the alley mouth?"

"No…Gunn, could you have two of your crew go with her to wave them into alley when they show."

"Sure, man," Gunn responded, waving all three of his companions toward the exit. "You doin' a little double jeopardy on the vamp, now?"

"Oh, yeah," Xander deadpanned, turning to stare the undead creature in the eyes. "You have two choices of death, very slow and painful or a quick staking. I have plenty of holy water and blessed silver bullets that will tear into your groin and stomach. I also have liquefied blessed silver for your blood stream. Now, where is your lair and where is Knox's lair?"

When the vampire stared at him silently, Xander poured holy water all around the but not on the vampire's lower sections, the screams turning to whimpers detailing directions and addresses. Sirens pulled up as a poofing sound left things in the alley strangely quiet.

"Damn, man," Gunn stared uncomfortably at Xander, "that was harsh."

"Evil demons don't get mercy," Xander sighed. "They're carrying on in the bodies of their first victim. This isn't something I like. And we have a chance to save another couple of people."

"You want help?" Gunn asked. "I have about a dozen guys with bows and crossbows and shit that can meet us there."

"How are you on super-soakers with holy water?" Kowalsky asked, having weeks ago lost his aversion to fighting along willing and capable teenagers when reminded he'd signed his first hitch at fifteen, faking the papers. "That would make me feel better until we know you all better and your capabilities."

"We owe you," the youth replied. "If that means support work, fine. We have a few soakers and some balloons. I'll make the call."

"C-can you have your three," Giles inserted into conversation, "er, crew accompany, uhrm, 'Lady J' to the hospital. I-if any other vampires witnessed the altercation, it would be best if she had support."

"Not a problem," Gunn responded, then relayed his instructions to his crew. "Our chief's in the ER. We were on our way there to check on him when this all went down." He made the call for back up.

The ambulance crews had just put Kendra and her badly injured, when Gunn witnessed Xander slip a bundle a money to Jenny Calendar. As the EMS crews departed, and the police finished collecting statements regarding the drug gang that had run off, Gunn sidled up to Xander. "So what's up with the green? You 'Infierneros' aren't runnin' in our hood are you?"

"Nope. We just clear out the lairs of the vampires we dust," Xander replied. "That third address the vamp gave us was his apartment. You guys check it out during daytime tomorrow and take what you can use. Don't leave prints or food…You ready? Let's go."

Ten minutes later, the 'Gunn Men' and the "Infierneros' met a block from the intended target. Xander and Kawalsky covered the basic op details, what was expected from everybody, and how things would hopefully go down as they watched a seventies black Cadillac and a dark eighties sedan pull up in front of the small targeted abandoned warehouse. A vampire and his nine minions exited the vehicles, addressed the two minions on the door, and headed in. Gun whispered angrily, "Knox." Kowalsky signaled Xander to race ahead at top speed, as he waved Gunn's fighters to hurry forward. It had just become a front assault.

Xander sped down the sidewalk at an incredible speed, 45 cal and sword in hands. The vampires, now on the ball since the arrival of the unplanned 'reinforcements' noticed Xander and drew weapons. Xander, relying on his intensive training as well as his adrenalized reflexes, opened fire repeatedly without slowing down. Both vampires eventually explode, and two more racing out to investigate were downed as the weapon emptied. Surprise gone, Xander leapt feet first and sword in two hands as he cleared the doorframe to knock down one of the new arrivals. Xander slashed and spun, slashed and stabbed, punched and kicked, trying with barest success to keep his opponents off-balance until his support arrived. Six minions felt hammer-hard blows and major burns from otherwise minor scratches as his sword demanded attention. Two minions screamed and whirled away from Xander and to the door, newly-drawn revolvers barking as 45s returned in anger, poofing of dust, screams on both sides, and general collapse into melee took over as Xander was punched hard in the side, knocking him into the office portion of the warehouse. Punched again, he managed to not only keep his sword in hand, but block a follow up blow with the cutting edge. His opponent, the hated Knox, screamed in pain and rage as the fighting subsided outside. Xander, hurt, settled for a short stab at his opponent, who threw a lamp at him and forced himself through an emergency exit and into an alley.

Xander, appreciating his hurt, quickly reclosed the exit door, and carefully entered the main area of the warehouse gain to find two of Gunn's people critically injured from gunfire, and another half-dozen beaten hard and fatigued. Kowalsky and Doyle both were found bandaging each other up after applying first aid to a half-dozen bullet scrapes as Giles led four kidnap victims to the safety of the group. Two were shopkeepers in Gunn's neighborhood, and the other two were convenience store clerks who'd been grabbed along with cases of beer right out of the stores.

Reaching into his pocket, Xander walked over to the grievously wounded teenagers to find them field-patched and their wounds as pass-throughs. Throwing two of his reserve cakes to the majors, he grabbed his last two and knelt by the two still-conscious but scared kids. "Here, it's…magic healing…eat the entire thing and repeat 'please heal me' as I pray for help. You understand?" At their nod, Xander in Mycenaean Greek asked his mother for her blessing on the entire group, especially those partaking of her gift to her son. As the 'Gunn Men' made noises of wonder at the sudden and complete healing of their comrades, Xander opened his eyes to find Giles looking at him with great consideration.

Escorting the rescued outside, Giles came back a moment later. "Apparently they believe they can get home on their own. I-it makes things easier for us, I suppose." Looking around the warehouse to find 'the majors' explaining the ins and outs of vampire lair tactics and looting and story-swapping with the locals, Giles continued. "One of these days, Xander, I hope you'll tell me who our parents really are. Mycenaean Greek narrows things down to beings very much higher and lower than humans."

While he knew better, Xander sighed softly, "Trust issue, Giles?"

"N-No! Not at all, Xander," the librarian admonished. "B-but my curiosity and Watcher training are both desperate to know. Not to pass on without your permission, but for my own ability to advise and plan."

"Thank you, 'G-Man', I appreciate the trust," Xander responded with feeling, "Your word on this?" Giles nodded, extended his hand as well.

"On the way back home, let your girlfriend drive, and as she starts out you will repeat the phrase I'm about to tell you, and not interrupt her until she is done. The phase is 'Alexander bids you to reveal your birth name, purpose in Sunnydale and that which you know of Alexander and his lineage. By his command.' And Giles, on your given word I expect you to accept absolutely everything she tells you at that point as absolute truth."

"Very well, Xander," Giles replied. "And I must say two things to you that I've noted, and hopefully are to be explained with your, er, explanation. Your vocabulary has much improved since Halloween. If not for your much-diminished but still present American style of humor, I'd be concerned. Also, your friends miss you greatly, beyond patrolling. Today's venture with the, ah, miniature golfing, I believe is something you should do more often. Both Willow and Buffy would both be better emotionally if you'd spend more time with them in a, er, non-professional capacity."

"Wow, Giles," Xander responded, noticing the approach of the others. "I'll shave off an hour or so off training, maybe take them out for dinner and dancing?"

"Excellent, and thank you," the mentor-figure smiled happily but still reserved.

"Yo, Colonel," Gunn greeted, waving some cash in his hand, "Looks like you got a good thing goin with this dust and loot thing. The crew and I might just do the same."

"Don't worry yerself, Colonel," Doyle said, waving back Xander's nascent response. "We explained about the measures to be taken and such, and to start small until they can work in teams…and I gave him our cell numbers and got his, just in case."

Seeing the nods of approval and the waiting expectation of the Gunn crew, Xander backed up his teammates and their decision, moving toward the door. "Cool. That way if one of us hears something, we can exchange notes. And if we're going to be in town…"

Three hours later, on the road back to Sunnydale, Kendra and her watcher had been invited to convalesce at the Hellmouth for the holidays when they'd awakened briefly, and left contact information. About the time their vehicles passed by Point Magu, a stunned and somewhat overwhelmed Rupert Giles patted his girlfriend's hand and quietly sat pondering the 'gypsy revelations' and possible ramifications.


	7. Chapter 7

Xander(us) Seven: Girl Stuff Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

**These are bits I hadn't quite finished to the point of integrating into Xander(us) Six. I hated to let them drop, as they're not bad background for what comes next in the series.**

**November 18th SHS Library, Lunchtime**

"Well, let me tell you," Cordelia Chase pontificated, "the look on that Harmony's face was almost as good as the extra spending money."

"Oh," Willow said, adjusting the hem of her dress, "Does that mean I can change back into my own clothes now? A week of this and people staring at me…"

"Including a certain Mr. Harris," Cordelia snorted, amused and to her confusion a little envious. "Listen," she asserted quietly, to avoid being overheard, "if you're seriously wanting Xander…you're going to have to pursue him…before any of the others do?"

"Others?" Willow gulped, her own fears preventing her from noticing the wistful look that quickly disappeared from Cordelia's face. "What others? Is he seeing someone already?"

"No, Willow, he hasn't," Cordelia assured her. "But look at him. He's attracting attention. Amy Yip and her little group…braiding his hair at the water park, the looks he's been getting, even from my sheep," Cordelia sighed, and this time Willow did notice.

"You like him too, don't you," Willow asked quietly. "I see it in your eyes."

"N--, maybe a little," Cordelia conceded. "But you have an inside track I can't hope to match. And for reasons I can't explain…better you than Buffy…Maybe I can explain it…she'll only want him because he's all that's left of Angel…and not for him."

"D-Do you love him?" Willow asked even quieter, meeker.

"I-I don't think so, but I'mreally starting to notice him," Cordelia admitted. "But I haven't really minded hanging out with you for the last week…Buffy sometimes…with you I can carry on an intelligent conversation, and if the rumor leaked out I could sodeny it…so I'd rather help than hinder until you've taken your chance. After that? Who knows?"

"So now what?" Willow asked, not hating Cordelia, this confusing her greatly.

"I'm thinking a trip to the salon for you," Cordelia mused. "give your hair a little bounce, might have to trim or thin it a bit…" Willow stared at her 'friend' and gave in as they headed for class.

**November 18th After School in Quad**

"Xander!" Buffy called out as her friend headed in the direction of the parking lot. "What are you doing tonight?"

"Why Miss Summers," the young man responded with mock shock and a bad British accent. "One might believe that a lead in to asking me out."

The young blonde gaped like a fish and blushed, before rolling her eyes and shaking her head. "No, Xander," she finally responded as he smiled at her, "though you do still owe me a dinner. I was wondering if you'd patrol with me tonight?"

"Um, sure," he replied. "Hope about I pick you up around sevn, we'll swing back to get 'the majors' since we were going to practice 'stalking the enemy to the lair and dust it.' After that, you and I will do a sweep of the cemeteries?"

"Sounds good," she smiled back, glad for some normality returning to her life. "See you at seven."

"You're looking extra nice tonight," Joyce said, looking up from paying bills as her daughter entered the kitchen. "Who's the boy? Anybody I know?"

"No, Mom," Buffy replied, a little slowly, "Just Xander."

"Well, he seems nice," her mother added, smiling as she finished balancing the checkbook, "You could do worse."

"Mom, it's not a date, alright," Buffy responded, rolling her eyes as she knocked back a glass of juice."

"Oh, so what are you doing on this not-date?" Joyce smiled as she tortured her teenaged daughter. "Dinner? A romantic walk?"

"Mom!" Buffy whined. "Maybe dinner was mentioned, and maybe a walk later, but no romance. He's just a friend. And besides, Willow has the hots for him, not me."

"Alright, honey," Joyce smiled into her coffee, "If you say so."

**IHOP near the highway, 8:15 PM**

"Thanks for dinner, Xan," Buffy smiled, glad that things seemed normal with her Xander-shaped friend. She'd been unable to figure out her feelings since Halloween; on one hand, she'd always liked Xander, and the few days before the costume disaster he'd looked good in black, while afterwards she couldn't tell if it was Xander she liked dressed as Angel, or she really just looked for something of Angel to carry over into her best male friend.

"Not a problem, Buff," her friend in tight black clothing replied, smiling. "Though a triple stack of blueberry pancakes, strawberry syrup with bananas and bacon smushed between them, and a dinner salad on the side, confuses even my food brain."

"Hey, I'm a growing slayer," she smirked. "I eat what and how much my body tells me as long as no other soul but Garbage Maw of Doom himself is around to witness it."

"Well, then maybe should eat more," he flirted back. 'Because you still seem a bit on the wee side for a growing slay-gal."

"Hey, watch it with the short jokes," Buffy admonished, lightly smacking him. She was surprised at just how muscular her friend had become. 'Hmmmm…' She came out of her reverie to find a bemused Xander holding the IHOP door for her as they left the restaurant.

**Xander's Place, 8:30 PM**

KnockKnock-Rap-Knock-Knock-Rap Xander struck the door. Doyle opened, allowing them entrance.

"Hey, you two. Kinda early?" the Irishman asked. "You ready to head out already?"

"Nah," Xander replied. "Buffster wanted to join in the fun, and after grabbing a light dinner," he smirked at her, "figured we'd explain our way of doing things." He looked up to see Kowalsky coming out of the backroom, mostly ready.

"Pretty straightforward stalk and dust op for tonight," Kowalsky said. We're going to pick a single, or as Miss Summers is kindly joining us, a pair of vampires, practice stealth and shadow methods to its lair or until it finds a victim, then dust it. If a lair, we'll damage and interrogate it before dusting the demon and looting the place."

"Standard or anything special?" Xander asked, looking toward their gear room.

"Just standard dark clothes, combat vests and balaclavas," Doyle responded, opening a cabinet and appraising Buffy's form. "Soakers and balaclavas."

"What's a baklava-thing?" the girl asked as dark coveralls and dull-black squirt gun was handed to her.

"That's the ski mask thing, Buff," Xander laughed. "Didn't you know that as a super hero you're entitled to a mask to protect your normal identity?"

"Don't I need a cape to be a hero?" she mused, putting the coveralls on over her clothes.

"You get the cape when you get your driver's license," Xander joked, then only a little lightly added as he finished gearing up, "and you're always my hero, Buff."

It was really a fairly easy undertaking; since it was still pretty early in the evening, they'd simply tossed a holy water canister into Willy's bar, then followed three evacuees back to their apartment. Buffy was chomping at the bit to get in some hits, but a few amused looks from Kowalsky kept her quiet for the sake of Xander and Doyle's training. As they approached the apartment where a party was being held, Buffy came up close and whispered to Kowalsky that someone was tracking them. He signaled the other two to soaker twice then run back to catch the tail. They nodded, then as holy water caused the vamps to stumble and turn in shocked pain, Kowalsky used a silenced automatic to head shoot 'his' vamp as Buffy dusted hers traditionally, but with flair.

The young woman watched as two dark figures moved against their victims, and was about to dive in when the victims went 'game face' and were quickly dusted. Curious, but caution winning out, she started to back away and turn from the scene when a stream of water splashed her hair and face to distract her as a voice addressed her from beyond arms reach.

"Just remain a-calm, and no one a-here needs to be a-hurt," a young male voice told her in a very bad Zorro/Spaghetti Western accent. "Please, do not panic, and do not reach for weapons. We just want to know why you're following us."

"I saw follow de vam-pyres. I tought dat de were humans," the Caribbean teenager responded. "When de were not and your people had defeated dem, I was leavin'. So, who are you people?"

"We're the a-Hunters," Xander improvised, continuing the bad accent. "Who are you?"

"I am Kendra! De Vampire Slayer!"

"Okay, lass one more time," Doyle responded. "You're the who!"

"I'm de Slayer," she replied cautiously.

"We've already made the, ah, acquaintance of the slayer here, and you're not her," Xander continued as Buffy and Kowalsky showed up. Xander waved them to hold off as she turned to look at them. "So, tell you a-what, Miss a-Kendra," he considered, I will take you to the Slayer and her Watcher, and they a-will sorta dis out. Fair enough?" At her nod he walked over to Kowalsky and Buffy.

"Drive ahead and warn Giles. Buff, you change clothes and leave them in the car. Go touch up a bit. That way she won't necessarily guess who you are. Best if you're seated and pretending to train or research when we arrive." Turning to the Major, Xander continued. "Soon as you drop her off, park around the corner from the school. Change clothes from the trunk and meet Doyle behind the library in case they need support. "I'll change in the car into my usual, braid out and stroll in as 'Happy Harris, cover boyfriend for the Slayer.' Okay?" They nodded and headed off.

Xander walked back to Doyle and Kendra, checking around for observers. Finding none, he indicated a direction, and handed her an extra balaclava.

"To protect your identity, Kendra," Xander assured her. "Certainly your beauty is a-nothing one would ever wish to a-cover, hmm?"

The mocha-skinned girl blushed and put on the cover as Xander smirked inside his own, then informed them, "I sent Raven and Dove ahead to let Watcher Giles know of your arrival, and to call Slayer Summers and her…companion…so they'll be there as well." Turning to Doyle, he gave semi-coded phrases, "they'll do a quick run and you'll meet up in the outback and do a recon from the vehicle. I drop off Kendra with-a de Watcher and leave for a while."

They walked to the Library, giving Kawlasky and Buffy sufficient time to prepare.

**SHS Library, Outside, 9:35 PM**

Xander, helping Kendra to remove her mask, also looks around at her hair and clothes as she actually looks uncomfortable at the attention.

"What are you doing, sir?" the girl asks, taking a step back.

"If, my a-beauty you are who and what you a-say," Xander plays, "Then it would not hurt to look unruffled, hmmm?"

"Tank you, then, sir," she replies, still quiet. Xander looks at her and nods, holding the door for her.

"My Lady?" he smiles under the mask. "Entre-vous?"

Xander strides in, pretending to own the place, finding Giles and Buffy pretending to train as Jenny, Willow and, to his surprise, Cordelia look up from books they're pretending to research.

"Senor Giles, Senoritas!" he manages to shout and then loudly purr as he makes it to the middle of the room. "Night Hawk is, how you say, here again!"

Giles looks pained as the girls exhibit amusement and physical appreciation as they laugh.

"Yes, er, Mr. Night Hawk," Giles begins, not really feigning confusion despite Buffy's warning. "I believe we were told to expect you and, er—"

"Kendra de Beautiful Vam-pyre Slayer, huh?" Xander introduces, then grabs Buffy, slings her into a dance-dip, and fake-whispers, "but only a-matching as moonlight to you're a-sunlight, Miss Soomers, eh?" Letting her up as she chokes out a laugh and a blush, he kisses her hand, and turns to Giles and Kendra. "Sad to say, Night hawk must go 'poof' some vampires, but not in the British a-meaning…" Winking, bowing to the girls, leaving on the table five of the half-dozen roses he'd planned to give Buffy before chickening out, and melodramatically sighing, he left, "Ladies, duty a-calls, and I…a-listen."

**Ten Minutes Later**

Xander in his school clothes and persona, enters the library to find Kendra standing at attention as Giles paces. Buffy's leaning on a chair with her left hand and has her right hand on her hip while the three others are gossiping about 'Night Hawk' and his visit as they each twirl a rose in hand.

"Hello, Giles, everyone," Xander greeted them. "I got a call from the Hunters telling me to drive over here in case you need something…er, uhm, who's this, if I may?"

"Oh, Xander," Giles responded. "This is Kendra…apparently a Vampire Slayer. Kendra, this is Mr. Harris, he pretends to be Buffy's errant boyfriend for her cover as Slayer here."

Xander looked blankly, then frowned at Giles as he offers his hand to the teenaged girl. "Hi, plese call me Xander. The others here tend to."

"I-It is a pleasure to m-meet you, sir?" the Girl responded, eyes downward but taking his hand. Giles continued as Xander sat on the corner of the table opposite of the three seated females, Kendra's back facing away from them so that the girls freely waved their flowers at him with smiles and rolling eyes.

"And your Watcher is, i-is Sam Zabuto, you say?" Giles asked, then continued at her affirmation, "We've never met, but he, he's, he's very well-respected."

"What, so he's a real guy?" Buffy asks seeking confirmation. "As in non-fictional?"

"Yes, Buffy," Giles confirms, "Uh, there's obviously some, some misunderstanding here. It, uh, seems somehow that, uh, another Slayer has been sent to Sunnydale."

"Is that even possible?" Willow queried. "I mean, two Slayers at the same time?"

"Not to my knowledge," Giles admitted, then realization shows on her face as he continues. "Um, th-the new Slayer is only called after the previous Slayer has died. Oh, good Lord! You were dead, Buffy."

"I was only gone for a minute," the blonde slayer protests.

"Three or four actually, until I revived you," Xander corrected.

"Clearly it doesn't matter how long you were gone," Giles exhaled. "You were physically dead! Thus causing the activation of the, the next Slayer, Kendra.

"She died?" Kendra asked, looking at the group, "And why do all dee people know she's de Slayer?"

"She drowned," Xander offered, placing a comforting hand on Buffy's shoulder. "But she got over it pretty quick." Giles rolled his eyes and resumed control of the proceedings.

"Uh-uh, Kendra, uh, there are a-a-a few people, uh, ci-civilians

if you like, who, who know Buffy's identity," the librarian conceded. "Those you see here provide research support and a general cover for her. A-a-and they also, um, spend time together, uh, socially."

"And you allow dis, sir?" Kendra pressed.

"He has to Kendra," Xander interrupts, pointing at the floor on which she's standing. "You're standing on top of the Hellmouth, under the floor there. Not all demons come out after dark, so Buffy goes to school during the day in case an evil attempts something, and we cover for her…different behavior. Our socializing is to the local clubs where the less-intelligent but more daring vampires new to town seek a quick meal on a teenager, so we cover for her while she stakes them in the alley or bathroom. But she's still the Slayer. When she patrols, she gets information from those Hunter guys, while we read books and do our and her homework with the Hellmouth under our study session. Make sense?"

"De Slayer must work in secret for security," Kendra stated, then splitting her attention between the two males, but mostly Giles, "But I understand your reasons and your tactics, Sir…Sirs."

Giles, Buffy and Kendra start talking Slayer stuff, leaving Xander to head back to the table to socialize with the girls. When Kendra's not looking, Xander waves a signal letting Doyle and Kowalsky know they can head back.

"So, Alexander," Ms. Calendar mock-purred as the youth sat down, "why'd you change out of those tight pants of yours… Willow was nearly blinded at your Zorro look." The red head blushed deeply, hand to her face. Xander then noticed her different hair style, which with the clothes she'd been wearing gave him thoughts not commonly thought by a Xander to a Willow.

"Hey, Wills, nice hair," he smiled at her, earning a smile as her hand moved to adjust it. "I like it, is there a certain someone whose attention you're seeking?"

"Uh, uh, no," she stammered and froze, turning to face Cordelia with pleading eyes. This left her open to humor on Xander's part.

"You and Cordelia!" Xander deadpanned, and in jest allowed his eyes to glaze over at the thought as Willow choked and Cordelia gasped, for once unprepared for a come-back. "Wow, I mean, I'd actually hoped to ask both of you out but if you'd rather it be just the two of you…"

"No!" they both choked out, blushing and looking to Ms. Calendar for helped, only to have her catch Xander's eye and play along with him. She stood up and started to the Slayers and Rupert.

"Your personal matters, I'll leave you three to discuss," the gypsy winked at the girls, "Later."

"No?" Xander straight-faced the reply, gesturing between the tow well-dressed young women. "So you'd both be willing to have dinner with me? Even with what you have between you?"

"Yes! No! Ahhh!" they struggled against the tide of his words, and gave up, both shell-shocked at what he was thinking.

"Okay, I gotta go, then." Xander smiled, taking one of their hands each into his and kissing them. "I'll pick you two up at Cordelia's house at 6:30 tomorrow night. I'll make reservations, and we'll dine at an Italian place I hear is good in Santa Barbara. Let's go semi-formal. Cordelia please give Buffy a ride home. Bye." And he left them speechless as he snickered his way to the car. 'How the hell did I get away with that…must be the Angelus skills.'

**SHS Morning, Before First Period Class**

"Xander! Wait up!" Buffy Summers called after her friend as he was about to enter the halls of the school. Xander paused, and stepped out of the way f scurrying students.

"Hey, Buff," Xander greeted with an easy smile, "Everything work out with Kendra last night?"

"Yeah, sure," she replied, then scrunched her brow into a slight frown, "Though it's still kinda weird having a second slayer around. It reminds me of the fact that I died."

"Ah, but you're here, and that's of the good, Buffy," Xander assured her. "Oh, was there anything you wanted me for, or just a chat before class?"

"Yeah, 'Boyfriend,'" she smiled accusingly. "What's this I hear of you 'cheating' on me with both Willow and Cordelia?"

"Oh, that," Xander smirked. "Those two just kept tripping over their own words, now we'll see if they're actually around or if I'll be dining alone tonight at Antonio's"

"What's gotten into you, Xan" Buffy laughed. "You're more…"

"Outgoing, confident, daring, devil-may-care?" Xander asked with a smirk but slightly saddened eyes. "A certain Demon was as good at luring the ladies as I am at swapping jibes and insults; a certain broody guy read a lot of books, many of which include wooing, flirting and such. And I always acted the goof to cover my own unhappiness, or to make others more at ease. Combine them together with a Xander that will probably never have a successful relationship, and you have…me."

"Wow, Xan," Buffy stepped back in consideration. "How'd that all piece together? It sounds complicated."

"Nah," Xander replied, holding the school door for her, and they walked to her nearby class, "When you suddenly have all that literature become memories all at once you get the big theme of it all…if the characters in the stories talked to each other, the great works of literature would be two very short pages, since they wouldn't run around misinterpreting things like idiots."

"Hmmmm," Buffy acknowledged, as he held the door for her class, "I guess you, not Willow, will be helping me with my next English assignment."

"Only if you let me help you with your Frenching assignment, Buff," the Jokester quipped as he headed to class leaving a scored-upon and blushing slayer to her studies, her fellow classmates snickering.

Coach Harrold continued his recruitment pitch regarding the advantages to the school and for Xander if he signed up for the wrestling, martial arts and other teams.

Xander, enjoying the sensation of the Amy Yip and Amy Madison braiding his hair again, sighed, and decided to turn things to Scooby advantage.

"Hey Coach," Xander interrupted. "I have a couple of trainers that have been getting me into shape for Special Forces after graduation, and I'm also helping a few students with self-defense and muscle-building. If you get them access and permission to public areas outside of school hours and during free periods, I'll join the martial arts, weightlifting and wrestling teams."

"Oh," the coach replied, not really expecting easy compliance. He watched enviously as the girls kept running their hands through Xander's hair. "Well, I'll need their names and such, for students and non-students, and I'll run it by Snyder. You'd also need at least one faculty member on campus for liability reasons."

"Mr. Giles is always around, and so is Ms. Calendar," Xander assured him. "And access is for the school year, not the season. So anything else?"

"Well, Harris," Coach Harrold responded, "It'll probably mean cutting your hair so it won't affect your performance." The girls stopped for a moment, not happy about the hair issue.

"Well, my performance has nothing to do with hair length," Xander quipped, the girls giggling and rolling their eyes, "but if the hair becomes a real problem in competition, I'll cut it to mid-shoulder and try that. Also, I'm allowed to take my own transportation to meets and such. Deal?"

"I'll see what Snyder says, but yeah," the coach happily concluded, with visions of victories, "Deal!"

Turning to the two non-Slayerettes. "It looks like I'm gonna be too busy until Winter Break for anything fun. How about the three of us head out to LA for dinner and dancing to mourn the possible loss of my hair? I just got the car detailed."

They rolled their eyes, but knew he was a fun date that wouldn't try anything.

**Monday, December 15th, Los Angeles**

"Ms. Drusilla?" the well-dressed woman asked as the vampiress glided into the office. The lawyer looked through the files on her desk, especially the Boston referent in the matter. "I'm Lilah Morgan, Mr. Holland's representative. He has informed me that given new circumstances from this past weekend, we'll indeed accept payment and contract to…reintroduce…your family to the world."


	8. Chapter 8

Xander(us) Eight Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

**Mayor's Office, 9AM, December 15th, 1997**

Allan Finch entered his boss's office wondering what reaction would develop from the information we would impart. Sighing, he braced himself and entered.

"Sir?" Allan addressed the mayor, "I have an odd report from a couple of our…alternative information sources…you might want to give us some guidance on…" The Mayor gestured at him to proceed. "Well, it seems that your…trophy case was broken into and the Aurelian remains removed…and our listening device seems to indicate that Angelus' urn was stolen from its interment." The Mayor's expression darkened as the news progressed. "And we believe that the Du Lac cross was in Sunnydale and has now been removed as well."

"Well, Allan," the Mayor actually grimaced, "It looks like someone wants to bring back those troublesome Aurelius vampires. Did they remove the entirety of the collection contents?"

"Yes, sir, they removed the various effects as well as the collective dust," the Deputy Mayor listed the removals, "What…venue should we pursue?"

"Well, Allan, I'll just have to make a few telephone calls back East…"

"Hey Xander," Andy Hoelich called out, "You ready for the last meet of the month this weekend?"

"You bet, Andy," Xander called back to the gymnastics team captain, "And I'll see you at practice tomorrow." He turned back to the girls and current conversation as they headed to class. "So, Buff, I just don't know who would steal Angel's urn or old clothes. But we'll make 'em hurt when we find them. Promise."

"Thanks, Xander," Buffy returned, sighing, "It's just one more little hurt on top of everything else. Oh, and that reminds me, mom wanted me to check and make sure you and the Major are still coming to dinner tonight."

"You bet," Xander replied, then reached into his pocket, "But I have to ask you something. After eating Ted's cookies at mini-golf did you two feel different?"

"No, I felt great," Willow responded, "Buffy?"

"Yeah, me too, in spite of Ted's weirdness," the slayer replied, "Better than expected any way. What're you getting at?"

"Not sure, but I thought I'd have Willow check this last cookie out in a non-eating capacity," Xander considered, "There was something in it or the twinkies that made Doyle and Kowolsky bounce of the walls in happy land before throwing up, and I want to make sure it's the cookie. The other possibility is too great a horror to consider."

"So you think he's drugging us?" Willow asked, Buffy looking shocked then hopeful. "And what about you? You didn't say."

"Nah, I think it might be a food allergy," Xander replied, "The guys threw up and felt great pretty fast. But I'm less likely to be affected by anything not fatal, and my only home-cooking experience that hasn't been bad has come from the Rosenberg, McNally or Summers households. So it's probably not Ted. But if I'm having dinner around Ted, I'd rather just avoid the experience, thank you." Buffy sighed, then headed into the room first. Xander held Willow back, whispering, "But if it is drugs, call me on your cell phone and let me know."

"But don't you know if it is or not?" Willow whispered back.

"Willow, if you want to do a bunch of narcotics taste tests with me," Xander smirked while shaking his head, "I guess I could tell you afterwards if I came across something. Remember, the only 'thyme' at my house was 'time to go get another bottle from the liquor store.'" They both grimaced as class began.

**Summers House 7PM**

Buffy, Joyce, Ted, Xander and Kowolsky are seated at the dining room table. Small talk and general introductions had pleasantly taken place, asking about work, talking about the gallery. Xander with his 'inherited memories' and Charlie with his world travel and general experience arising from the Abydos missions, had offered surprising incites into a few of Joyce's problems, suggesting Mr. Giles as a possible contact for appraising weird objects. Something about Ted, however, bothered Xander, though he hadn't quite figured it out when Buffy started to crack around the edges as the conversation moved back toward the mundane. Finally a simple reference to dinner opened her up.

"Well, Joycie," Ted asked, "What do you think of dinner?" The men nodded with full mouths.

"I think every home should have one of you. It's fantastic!" Joyce responded, smiling enthusiastically, "Don't you think so Buffy?" Ted smiles over at Buffy.

"Looks good," she assured him, poking at it with a fork.

"Well, you know, little lady, it's not just for looks," Ted smiled, "It's for

building strong bodies." Buffy just sits there staring at Ted.

"Are you two engaged?" Buffy asks, seemingly out of nowhere. Ted raises his head in realization of something.

"Goodness, no!" Joyce replied, "Whatever gave you that idea?"

"Now, Joycie, let me handle this," Ted pressed, placing a hand over hers reassuringly, "Buffy, your mother and I are taking it one step at a time. And if things go the way I hope, maybe someday soon I just might ask her to tie the knot. How would you feel about that? It's okay to have feelings, Buffy, and it's okay to express them."

"I'd feel like killing myself," Buffy complained.

"Buffy!" Joyce exclaimed, shocked at her daughter's behavior

"No, no, I, I told her to be honest," Ted told Joyce, then turned to Buffy, "Sweetheart, you should try and get used to me, 'cause you know what? I'm not going anywhere."

"Joyce? Ted?" Xander interrupted, "I think I'll take a walk around the block with Buffy to let things settle before the really go to far?" He looked pleadingly into Joyce's eyes. She nodded.

"Great, now don't forget to save me coffee and dessert, okay?" Xander added light-heartedly, "And don't get Charlie too fat, Ted?" The adults were happier for the distraction.

**Summers Porch, twenty minutes later**

"Okay, I guess I'm ready to go back in," Buffy whined to Xander as they came back from a quiet and uneventful walk, and enter front door, "I'll go freshen up and be down in a minute to make nice. I did overreact before I'd had a chance to ask mom." Charlie and Joyce overheard this as the two youth walked into the house, and smiled. Buffy headed up the stairs.

"Wow, Xander," Joyce exhaled and raised her eyebrows, "How'd you get through to her?"

"Well it wasn't so much that, as just reminding her how hard things have been for both of you, and that even if this doesn't work out…that's no reason for her to expect no one else would come along. She'll be fine."

Buffy enters her room, intending to touch up her hair and makeup only to find Ted reading her diary.

"You've been going through my things?" Buffy asks, shocked.

"Yes, I have," Ted replied, "I don't see how it's any different from you snooping around my office, do you?" He waves the diary at her. "What exactly is a Vampire Slayer?"

"It's none of your business," Buffy declared, reaching for the book.

"Beg to differ, little lady," Ted retorted, "Everything you do is nothing but my business from now on."

"I think you better get out of here," she ordered, then slightly louder, "Now!"

"Or what?" he smirks, "You'll slay me? I'm real. I'm not some goblin you made up in your little diary. Psychiatrists have a word for something like this: delusional. So, from now on, you'll do what I say, when I say, or I show this to your mother, and you'll spend your best dating years behind

the wall of a mental institution. Your mother and I are going to be happy. You're not going to stand in the way. Sleep tight!" He starts to leave the room, and starts to push past her. Buffy follows him and grabs hold of his hand that has her diary.

"That's mine, and you are not leaving this room with it!" she shouted.

"Take your hand off me," Ted ordered. Buffy could hear someone raising a voice from downstairs.

"Not until you return my diary," she told him. Ted slaps her hard, almost punching her, and makes her hit the wall.

"Ohhh!" Buffy declared, "I was so hoping you'd do that." She punches him squarely in the jaw, and he staggers back into the open door. He pushes himself upright and backhands her in the face, making her fall against the side of her bed and onto the floor. He picks her up by the shirt collar, but she as she kicks him in the shin a large 'coffee table' book flatly strikes Ted in the head with an odd sound, knocking the off-balance salesman to the floor. Joyce comes to the door to see what all the noise is about.

"What's going on!" Joyce calls into the room as Charlie comes up beside her. Xander responds before Ted can.

"Ted likes to hit girls, Ted's going away now," Xander stated without emotion in his voice. Ted looked at him.

"I don't know why you and Buffy are doing this to me, but—" he started, only to have Xander interrupt him.

"Ted, show us your shin, please," Xander ordered, "Buffy slammed you in the jaw pretty hard, and kicked you good in the shin, but your face isn't showing any damage."

"I don't bruise easily," Ted grumbled, "And why do you care all of a sudden." He started to stand up, only to have Xander trip him over and pin him front to the ground.

"Joyce, Charlie," Xander called over his shoulder, "Please take his pulse, neck and wrist please." Joyce remained where she was, too shocked for words. Charlie did as he was ordered.

"No pulse, Colonel," Kowolsky slipped when he didn't find anything, "And no heart beat either. What is he?" Xander twisted Ted's arms tighter.

"Well, Ted," Xander addressed the unloving individual, "Tell me what you are or I'll get out a knife and damage something. Ted responded with his full strength, but Xander's own enhanced strength and their current position kept the salesman down.

"Robot," Ted whispered, Joyce now close enough to hear. She fainted. Buffy caught her and set her on the bed. "I'm a manufactured life form, a complete duplicate of my maker. I'm programmed to want a normal life. I don't want to be alone."

"Charlie, call Giles and Doyle," Xander ordered, "Have them recon in detail Ted's residence. Have Willow go with them and figure out a way to remove the Stepford Husband routine from Ted and just make him 'normal.'" Buffy and Charlie looked at him curiously, but he turned his attention to Ted. "Ted, too many people now know about what you are. It doesn't have to leave our circle. But we'll want to de-psycho you."

"You and your delusional vampire slayer girlfriend want to de-psycho me?" Ted grimaced, then laughed. Xander slapped him in the back of the head to quiet him.

"She'll never be my girlfriend no matter how many times I've saved her life or brought her back," Xander whispered angrily, "But guess what Ted? The bad things do exist and I can prove it. And you might just become part of the fight, Ted. Now how do I turn you off for now?" He felt around, and eventually found a push button disguised as part of a vertebra. Ted shut down.

"You're going to keep the robot?" Buffy reacted incredulously as Charlie got off the phone. "Why?"

"How about we make slay-bots as passable as Ted so you can have the occasional night off for studying or family dinners?" Xander asked her calmly, then winked. "And besides, I don't know for sure if we will."

"What about Mom?" Buffy asked, "She has a robot boyfriend, and now what?"

"Two things," Xander said smiling, "First, she finally gets told everything." Buffy looked horrified. "Who knows what this robot would've done, Buff. And the more she knows, the safer she'll be. Remember Darla? Or what if Angel had become Angelus? He already had an invite. And we can always program a maid-bot to help her out around the house and provide extra-buffilicious protection? Report, Major?"

"Sir, Rupert and Francis are on their way to Ted's place with Willow," Kowolsky replied, "And I guess we should get the robot down to the car?"

"Xander, what was the second thing?" Buffy asked.

"The Major will ask your mom out for coffee," he smirked, "Or haven't you noticed the way he's started looking at her since dinner started? And besides, throw in Giles and Jenny and she'll have people to talk about things with who know what you do at night." Kowolsky continued to look abashed as he tied up the robot for easier transport.

"Plus he knows the hurt he'll be in if he hurts her," Buffy conceded, causing the Major look even more uncomfortable and her smile to increase, "Good plan, Xander, except the telling her part."

"Not negotiable, Buff," Xander looked sadly at the woman starting to come to, "She has the right."


	9. Chapter 9

Xander(us) Nine Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback and review, I might come up with something more/better. 

**Summers House, 8PM, Tuesday, December 16th**

"This is quite the story, and would explain a lot," Joyce told the group in response to Giles' Slayer speech and the general recounting of tales since Buffy's arrival, "But do you have any real proof?" She looked around the room at Giles, Buffy, Willow, Cordelia and Jenny. A well-timed knock on the back door turned everybody's attention away from the conversation. Buffy got up and answered it.

"Everybody come out back," Buffy called out to the living room, "Nighthawk and his crew brought the proof." The others traversed from living room to back step, Joyce reticent. 'What if it's true?'

Joyce was surprised to find three dark-clad figures with balaclavas disguising their faces holding another man dressed poorly in clothes better suited for a colder climate. The 'prisoner' was thrashing around and swearing.

"Ah, Miss a-Joyce, it is a-pleasure to finally a-meet the Slayer's younger sister, no?" one of the figures spoke in a bad Zorro accent, stepping forward, "And I must a-pologize for the a dees-picable language this beast is a-using." He hands her a single white rose, and stage whispers, "Alas, biz-ness requires a less romantic ending to this meeting."

The two men held the captive tightly as Buffy had her mother touch a cross and dip a finger into water. Buffy then moved forward and addressed the vampire.

"I'm the Slayer, if you're good, this will be quick," she stated. She reached out and touched the vampire on the forehead with the cross, causing it to flinch back in full vampiric visage, cursing the Slayer. Joyce was shocked at the transformation, but carefully reached out and touched the ridges, pulling back in disgust.

"Using such language in front of my mother isn't making you any friends," Buffy said, glaring, "So now that mom saw that a cross isn't liked by you guys, let's show her what holy water does." She threw it at the vampire, which began to smoke and burn as it screamed in pain. Joyce backed up, horrified, but watched as Buffy pulled out a wooden stake and dusted the beast.

"How? What happened?" Joyce asked, walking forward to find the dust scattered around the undead's former location. "What happened to its clothes?"

"W-we don't a-really a-know, young lady," Xander continued in his very bad accent, "But vam-pyres seem to fill what touches them with their own aura, or a-energy, eh? So if the a-vam-pyre goes 'poof' everything goes a-with it yes?" Giles nodded, and one of the disguised men leaned forward to Xander.

"Colonel, it's time to go?" Doyle told the youth, who nodded.

"Duty, it a-calls us, yes?" Xander tortured a language, "So, a Buenas noches." They departed quickly and quietly into the night.

The group explained more about the things that existed and prowled the night, and after about ten minutes, reentered the house to find Xander and Charlie fighting over the television remote, Charlie getting the best of the younger man.

"Hey, Miss S, tell soldier-boy to give me the remote," Xander greeted and then glared playfully at the older man, "I've known you longer so I have seniority in taking your hospitality for granted." Joyce smiled, the mood lightening as 'normal' behavior glimmered in the midst of her troubled evening.

"I think we can skip the tv and settle for coffee and pastries, boys," Joyce smiled, now merely whelmed rather than overwhelmed, "And you can fill me in on what's been going on after the Reptile story, Halloween and such." Xander quieted, and gestured to Giles, getting up and heading to the kitchen with his coffee.

**Ted's House, 6PM, Wednesday, December 17th**

Xander walked into Ted's house for the first time, being too wrapped up in a quick shift in patrol tactics, and running a few excess weapons down to Gunn and his crew having used up much of his group's energy. Willow and Cordelia had planned a 'Girl's Night' and that had left Giles, Charlie and Doyle to help Xander go through Ted's stuff again. On the upside, the red-head had managed to crack the codes on the mainframe and back-up servers running in a rear basement. T-3 connection, back-up power and generator, forty-year-old food stocks in perfect condition. Xander detected a slightly familiar odor, but the sheer number of materials in the building prevented him from tracking it down. They found a small electronics shop with four half-finished Ted-bots.

"What do you guys think?" the young man asked his comrades, "I'm thinking we move in here and take advantage of the facilities."

"Yeah, Colonel," Kowolsky replied, "The guy was a technical genius and a survival nut. And his…robot…clones…kept it up and even tweaked it a bit." Doyle let out a 'hey' that attracted their attention. They found him in the front area.

"I tripped over the roog," Doyle blushed as he got up, "And look what I found underneath." They saw a trap door. Giles moved towards it when Charlie called him back.

"And it's part of an even bigger 'trap door' if I'm not mistaken," he said as he carefully traced out a section of flooring that seemed to match up with the unnecessarily high ceiling, "I'm guessin' if we head down there, we'll find a mechanism that activates a lift."

"D-doesn't that normally require cables?" Giles asked, looking upward.

"Not if all the machinery is under the lift, and pushes it up and lowers it down, probably no more than one to four levels," Doyle responded, then rolled his eyes at their looks, "Whot? I serviced elevators for a livin' while I was goin to school to become a teacher, alright?" They nodded.

"Well, let's clear off the top here, and head down," Xander stated, "Charlie and I first, so we can look around and see if there is any trappage. If not, then in six minutes, you two can follow."

Five minutes later, the two had made two discoveries: Ted's first four wives, and the lift controls. Using the latter, they directed it upwards, and most of the room slowly rose.

"Interesting," Giles remarked as the floors aligned themselves, "The furnishings on the top of the lift actually fit in the raised ceiling. One might never know that it was a lift."

"And one might never know 'Ted' kept his last four wives in a closet after they passed on," Kowolsky grimaced, "So Colonel, what are we gonna do about Ted?"

"Well, it's just a machine, right?" Xander asked, the others nodding, "If Willow can remove the code that makes him do a male black widow, we can reactivate him for slaying and maybe use parts to assemble some 'Slayer-bots' for helping out on patrols and such. Otherwise, we don't reactivate."

"Shall we call the police?" Giles asked.

"Nah, let's see where this lift goes in the other direction," Xander suggested, "Anyone want to stay up here? Thought not?" He waited as they moved to the center of the platform, and he hit button three, second and first being the two they knew about.

Five minutes passed, and the concrete walls scrolled by slowly until they halted at a room of equal size lighting up, like a small lobby. On the other side a large elevator with large doors opened and paused. Looking at each other, they noticed four buttons, with the top lit. They hit the second button and they could hear normal if large-scale elevator machinery working as their descent continued.

The doors opened into a huge cavern reinforced with steel and concrete, lights coming on throughout to illuminate the acre-sized chamber. Below them and off to the side, was what looked to be an exact replica of the building up on the surface. The rest of the way looked to be terraced gardens, well-manicured and designed for decoration and consumables

Across the way, a 'cliff-dwelling' seemed to rise up to fill in a fair section of the cavern, the reinforced flooring from the elevator to the structure indicative of heavy equipment being possibly inside.

"I-Impressive," Giles remarked, "It's like a giant…bunker or fall-out shelter I suppose."

"I think we've just found ourselves a new home, guys…" Xander murmured in awe, "We'll just need to be sure that it's really sealed from the outside world and you require a pulse to get in."

They explored and inventoried the place for nearly an hour, finding a full and up to date series of materials and processing shops, armory and weaponry being the only additions that might need adding. Finding a computer console, they'd called up schematics and, more importantly, a very detailed three-dimensional map of the Sunnydale area within a five mile radius of the bunker. Finding an icon that simply read 'Ted' and clicking on it, they in a sense met the man.

"Hello to any who find this terminal. As you may or may not know from my robot successor, I am, was, Ted. Regardless of the reasons for your being at this location in my sanctuary, I hope it wasn't the global war I expected to happen. If it was, I hope you really make use of my place to get through the difficult times you're going through. My brother and his wife have a similar place in Los Angeles, so hopefully one of us made it.

"Since you've reached this point, either my robot failed and you chanced upon the place, or you're just damned lucky, I don't know, but you need to input a user name and a password into the system, then stick your finger in the connector on the desk. I will continue when you have done this."

Xander looked at the others and they shrugged. Xander did as asked, Lavelle as user name and Angelus as password. Then he placed his finger in the slot.

"Ouch!" he cried out as a needle pierced the end of his finger, drawing blood, "That hurt!" The others looked half-concerned, half amused as the screen reactivated.

"Sorry for not telling you about that, but if you'd been…not alive…this place would be blowing up about now," Ted chuckled, "But since you have a pulse and your blood is showing as not being demonic…goo, the place and all that is Ted's is yours. As we speak, the system is making the necessary arrangements for all accounts, deeds and another niceties as I know them in 1960 or updated by the Tedbot, to be transferred to you upon completion of the form that will pop up after I'm done talking. If the Tedbot still exists, give the code on the screen and it will be rendered as obedient to your orders. At each shop or room station, you will be able to access the particular inventory and manuals. I hope the Ted that came after me 'lived' a good life. Good Luck."

Xander began filling out a lengthy form as the group discussed the matter.

"That was unexpected," Doyle admitted, "I wonder what happened to his brother, since obviously he never quite showed up."

"I'm guessing he either thought the Tedbot was Ted, or maybe he died about the same time and didn't tell anyone," Kowolsky said, "But if we don't suffer the fate of the pyramid's architects in the next few minutes this should work out." They all nodded at that, hoping for the best.

**Ted's House, 8PM**

"Okay, Xander," Doyle sighed with fatigued, "We, uh, figured out who the women were that the Tedbot killed, and talked to our contact at the funeral home. He'll be by in an hour with the three nice caskets, and he'll make space for them."

"Did they have any family?" Xander asked, finally accessing account information.

"None living now, sadly," Doyle remarked, "Though for us it means few if any questions."

"Did the funeral guy…John?" Xander tried to remember the name, "say how much it would cost for them?"

"'round thirteen grand for the three of 'em," the Irishman noted, "Nice, but not overboard, and one short service by Father O'Malley, the one I've had blessin' all our stoof."

"Good," Xander nodded, sighing, "They deserve someone to send 'em off proper, even if we're not family." 'Must be feeling a bit tired,' Xander thought to himself, 'I'm letting the Irish in a little.'

**SHS Main Entrance, 7:45 AM, Thursday, December 18th**

"Xander, wait up!" Jenny Calendar called out to the young man, taking a moment to catch up with him, "I just wanted to let you know I have…relatives in town looking into both the chaos magic waves and the Angelus disappearance."

"I so do not have time for this now," Xander sighed, "Tell them that 'Nighthawk' is responsible for the departure of the demon Angelus, and that the chaos magician is no longer in Sunnydale. I have no desire to meet with them at this time."

"If they force me to tell everything?" she asked quietly, "I've taken oaths of loyalty, Alexander."

"Then you will tell them that your King has returned, intends to destroy the Darkness within the next generation," he grimly emphasized with a nasty smile, "And will expect them to demonstrate proper obeisance in the old rites if they do not wait until gathered to be told more."

"The old ways," Jenny choked, remembering stories of centuries ago, where firstborn sons and daughters were given over to service until the declared mission was successful, succeeding children replacing the fallen ones.

"Just hold them off until after Christmas, Jana," Xander whispered, "After that we'll see where things are. An extra few teams in Sunnydale and LA would be nice."

"I was, uh, talking to Rupert…and he's under a lot of pressure from the Watcher's Council along similar lines," the teacher said, continuing the subject.

"I know, and I'll probably want the support of the Tribes and the Garoun before meeting with the Brits," Xander conceded, "Only some type of infrastructure will allow the tweed-men to see beyond my pretty face."

"If not at school, I'd make a comment, Alexander."

"Only a comment, Jenny?"


	10. Chapter 10

Xander(us) Ten Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback and review, I might come up with something more/better. 

**SHS Library, 2:45 PM, Thursday, December 18th**

"No school until January!" Xander happily exclaimed, "At least that's one thing that's gone right today."

"Oh, what's wrong, Xan," Buffy asked, "I though you were Property Guy?"

"Ah, Property Guy? Yes. Cash-in-Bank Guy? No?" Xander sighed, "It turns out our favorites Ted-Bot just paid all his bills a year in advance and upgraded all his systems, so he had a net balance of $25.32 in his accounts. After incurring transfer charges, getting out of my lease, buying replacement parts for Ted, paying off John and some other stuff, I now have four dollars and the glad tidings of having already shopped everybody's Christmas gifts last week."

"What about Ted's paycheck?" Willow asked.

"That's including that already, and the Christmas bonus money paid the car insurance and filled out groceries for the next month," Xander admitted, "We're cash-poor, not hurting, but I'm not planning to hit any more nests for another week or so."

"Yeah, things have been kinda quiet lately," Buffy noted, "So a little rest is good."

"So, Xander?" Jenny asked as she entered the room, "You guys having a house-warming any time soon?" Xander looked at her for a moment, then nodded.

"Well, we were kinda thinking New Year's Eve and Day for a 'big event' but we could throw it in so you all could just 'super-size' your food contributions," he said with a big smile. They turned around as a woman not of the school entered the room and walked over to them.

"Excuse me, I'm looking for Francis Doyle?" she asked. Xander stood up

"I'm Alexander, an…associate of his," Xander remarked, "Is there anything I can help you with?"

"Yes, I stopped by the mailing address I had for him, but he seems to have handed the keys in an hour ago," she replied, embarrassed, "I'm his wife Harriet Doyle." The girls looked surprised while Xander smiled widely.

"You're Harry!" Xander happily exclaimed, shaking hands with, "Well, that's different. Doyle's one of my housemates. We just finished moving today. Did you cab over?" She nodded, "Here, give me a sec and I'll drive you over myself. Do you have any really bad news or anything?" She shook her head, "Good, then you'll stay at our place. We have plenty enough room." She headed out ot send the cab on its way.

"You moved already!" Willow and Buffy chorused, "You just got the place!"

"We didn't have that much to move," Xander remarked, "But no coming over until we've had a chance to impress you."

"So no coming over tonight?" Buffy asked.

"No, I'm taking Cordelia and Willow out for dinner and dancing again," Xander replied, "So tonight wouldn't work any way."

"I thought you didn't have any money left," Buffy replied, "How can you afford it?"

"I have a tab at Rossini's," Xander remarked, "I could even eat for free for saving his life, but made him settle for letting me run up a tab once and a while."

"You do that often?" Willow asked, "The tab thing?"

"Let's see," he considered for a moment, "Maybe twenty places around town, and another ten along the Coast. They also keep an eye and an ear open for information."

"So this big 'bat cave" of yours must be like hitting the jackpot?" Willow asked.

"Nah, coolness aside, by the time we liquidate everything else to upgrade some of the amenities and manage to outfit the kids in LA so they're safe, and build up our supplies and pre-pay more medical at the hospital, we'll have split off pretty much everything. And then we'll have to deal with the noise from the low-rent housing they're putting up; seems our nest-clearing has moved up the schedule for it getting underway by four or five months. So we'll be better off; but it's a lot of effort."

"I'm still wondering how if you're supposed to be my 'cover boyfriend' you're always taking Willow and sometimes her and Cordelia out to dinner but never me."

"It's the insatiable sex, they're animals," Xander deadpanned as he left the library and a deep-blushing zinged-again Willow.

The 'When Harry re-meets Doyle' scene went smoothly; he told her he was entirely human and fought against the evil demons. She asked if he was happy; he said yes and that he'd gotten certified to teach at the High School atop the Hell Mouth. She said if he was finally happy, then she was staying, and already had letters of acceptance at four nearby schools for teaching and accepted at U Sunnydale for finishing up her Sociology and Anthropology Doctorates over the next two years.

"So, Alexander," Harriet Doyle asked the young leader of the group, "Where do I sign up?" Xander looked up from the other room, where he'd heard but not actually been listening as he'd watched The Major get ready for an early dinner with Joyce.

"Hmm, oh, sign up in what capacity?" he asked, getting up and walking into the room, "What would you feel qualified in doing?"

"Well, I read and speak two common North American demon languages, am at least passing familiar with the ethno-demonological composition of this continent, read Latin, Ancient Greek, Spanish and Portuguese, and cook far better than Allan Francis Doyle."

The latter is not hard to do, except that stew of his mother's with the little potatoes, Xander replied slowly to test her ear for the languages she claimed, eyes briefly glazing over when describing the stew, But the researching end of things will be a major boost. Welcome aboard.

"Thank you, Alexander," she replied with a smile, "I can read it and if spoken slowly have the ability to understand some of the languages. It's interesting that you understand the aural connection. Also, I make a wonderful loaf of bread or sometimes even bead bowls for that stew." Xander's eyes glazed over again briefly.

"Good, Harry," Xander replied, "I'm thinking you'll start being our liaison with Mr. Giles and Mr. Zabuto at the High School library. They belong to the Watcher's Council, who've been doing this longer but rarely get their hands dirty. Giles hasn't told any of his colleagues that he knows the identities of Los Infierneros, and I want to keep it that way, and working through you means less exposure to the others."

"Well, now that I'm 'in' as it were, where's our bedroom Francis?" Harriet asked her husband, "I'd like to unpack."

Alas, the Christmas season proved not to be entirely a time of peace as had been hoped. Los Infierneros had loaded up for three nights of nest-raiding and vamp-hunting in Los Angeles when Knox and his allies had been overheard planning to finally deal with Gunn's bunch.

Staring with an ambush on Knox's own headquarters, they'd rotated around the clock, eight nests and four apartments, two warehouses and an evil-demon pawn shop later and Knox had gone out with a flaming whimper when Alonna had activated a big warehouse automatic door opener and the East-facing edifice was flooded with sunlight as it rose and eliminated Knox and two of his lieutenants.

"So, uh, Lex, why'd ya call us to this old place?" Charles Gunn asked, his 'crew' and some of their families with them.

"This, my friends, as soon as we figure out how to get rid of the big nasty demon inside," Xander said, pausing, "Will become the Los Infierneros base in Los Angeles."

"Whoa, impressive, but why show us instead of just telling us?" Alonna asked, suspecting.

"Because I'm hoping to move in all of your people, eventually get things normal enough so we can get everybody under the age of sixteen back into school and into jobs," Xander quietly answered, smiling, "And after that, start getting your/our people into the stores and other businesses where they can earn a living and listen up for more demonic activity. But I have two conditions…"

"I knew there was a catch," Gunn sighed, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"You and Alonna need at least your GEDs by two years from now as an example to the others," Xander stressed, "And only you two will become co-owners with us of the place so no one but you two can invite in vampires or such by accident."

"How much is this costing?" Gunn asked, "Having spent most of the crew share on hospital treatments and groceries plus a few jackets."

"Not much, but I'm expecting to slowly fix it up over time, the crew can put in the effort to make their rooms decent," Xander replied, "And money-wise you offered us eighty-twenty, and except for expenses and a thousand, all eighty-five thousand went into getting the place for taxes-only, and getting the permits to get utilities and other permits going again. So, deal?"

"Deal," Gunn said, shaking Xander's hand as Alonna ran in to hug both of them as the Hyperion Hotel began to be occupied over the next month by humans again.


	11. Chapter 11

Xander(us) Part Eleven Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

New Year's Eve brought the gypsy elders and their three most-committed Hunter teams as muscle. Jenny had answered a final ultimatum Christmas Eve by passing on Xander's words. Uncle, do not arrive before the New Year and he'll not expect 'obeisance to be made in the old ways.'" An hour later he'd called back, and let her know to prepare for the arrival of the Elders of all the clans within a very short time, and that the Romani will report to her until then.

Xander and his group kept tabs on the newcomers, seeing if they would push things. Xander had decided that New Year's would be the time when secrets would be revealed to the entire group, the only stipulation being that the actual identities of Los Infierneros and the address of their base be left out of the Watcher reports. Xander had done some research, he'd said, and quietly taking aside Zabuto and Giles in his 'alternate persona' told them he trusted them personally, but without meeting their actual Council, wouldn't go beyond them in matters of trust.

The group had been escorted into Ted's 'over house' for the first part of the party, but guests had been told to plan a stay-over and to be awake for at least an hour beyond midnight as there would be a surprise.

The party had gone very well, everyone having a good time. Plenty of foods, some donated by various restaurants benefiting from timely interventions by Los Infierneros, gave a festive diversity compared to their normal lives.

At eleven-thirty, the door bell rang and the camera showed a group of older Romani, almost all men, waiting. Xander turned to Jenny Calendar, shaking his head.

"Jenny, let them in, but be warned," Xander told her gently, "They've tried my patience by this little half-hour power-play of theirs; it will be the Old Ways for them and theirs."

"What should I say to them?"

"Nothing, just let them in," he replied, nodding at Doyle and Kowalski to carry out orders already given, "Rupert, see you downstairs." He hit the button, and the floor began sinking into the depths as he and the other two made ready.

"Uncle, Elders," Jana addressed her people's leaders, "He awaits you." The group entered and looked around without being too impressed.

"I expected better from one claiming to be our King…" one of the old women told Jana, "This is drab."

"You would be best advised to keep your rudeness in check, crone," Xander stated from his chair behind a desk on the other side of the room, "Your presumptuousness to show before permitted requires a lesson. But that will wait." He gestured them to couches. When they hesitated, he raised his hand to show them his rings, pointed at them, then the couches again. They hesitated, then complied.

"You showed up before you were told, therefore it will be the Old Ways again," Xander informed them as he rose and began dressing in over-attire facing away, "This war against the darkness will be determined within the next generation, and the Romani will be there for the worst of it, and will come out of it known for what they've done. Jana, hand them the letter and the first journal from the desk please."

"Yes…Your Majesty," she gulped, the tension she felt in the room finally catching up to her as she found herself in a decisive moment in her people's history. Xander noted the hesitancy.

"Now, Jana," he responded, voice deepening as he finished donning his father's clothes, "You've been important to me before my parents moved on, do not hesitate with me ever. Only enemies and those who arrive early in contradiction of my directives need fear." He turned and almost as one they noticed the exactness in appearance of the son of Van Helsing and Valerious, her delicate features actually emphasizing the father's. Kowalski handed over the swords, Xander placing them on the desk, "Read the letter and compare the handwriting." He bent a metal rod placed into his hands by Doyle. He waited.

"Now, Jana has explained how I came into my heritage, and that Angelus our Enemy perished in that event," he stated as fact, "The next question is whether or not the Romani have enough fire of the soul and numbers to make a difference in the fight? Do they wish the extermination of the vampires and the dark enemies that influenced the near end of our people by the Nazis? Only Drusilla remains of the four vampires known as the Scourge of Europe. The other three and The Master have met their end in this town in less than ten months. The curse of Angelus I see now came about to release our family from the bondage of other Powers, but was stupid in its execution." He watched as the Elders grew angry. "You do not wrench a soul from the afterlife and torture it, you make sure the soul experiences humanity's best so that the demon is tortured. You should have blessed him with a soul and made him an entertainer for children; happiness and human joy would have been a hundred times more of a punishment to Angelus the Demon than brooding companionship with the soul. I will teach you how to make Justice and Vengeance one, a living thing and not just an idea ill-conveyed to those that came after my family's exile in time and space. So, acceptance of the truth and we get on with real exaction at the expense of the enemy, or denial and you return without hope of restoring the fortunes of your people? But first, a rebuttal to the untoward statement made by one old enough to know better." Xander nodded, and he stepped over to allow the elevator to rise.

At eight before midnight, the doors opened onto Ted's 'Blast from the Past' chamber, surprising and in comparison to the house above truly making a deep impression upon the Romani and Garoun Elders, a growl approaching almost a feline purr of delight escaping one Elder. That Elder turned to Xander.

"I feel your presence and for the Clans, I accept your claim," he said, bowing deeply with his head in the manner of wolves to an Alpha, "And upon my return to New York will swear to the rest of the Clan Council that you are the One. But if I may, what is that odd feeling to the canine in you?"

"Before I was…unsealed I was possessed by the Hyena Primal Spirit," Xander replied, the Garoun Elder and his bodyguard staring wide-eyed at their now-acknowledged Lord, "While the Spirit itself was displaced, some parts of its presence lingered within me."

"If the Garoun sense you are as you claim, the Romani will abide also," Enjos, their best English-speaker, considered, bowing at the waist, "Your Majesty."

"Alexander," the young man corrected, "While I hold this position, unless the need exists in the future for excessive ceremony, there is little need, and indeed the added attention will give greater focus to our enemies."

"Yes…Alexander," the old man replied, "What are your orders?"

"The obeisance of the Old Ways is my right, but I will exercise it differently," Alexander Van Helsing replied, "And we will speak of it tomorrow around noon, return then. Jana, join the rest of us downstairs, please."

With two minutes to spare, Xander reached the bottom where congregated

The rest of their group. The clock counting down, Xander found himself surrounded by Willow and Cordelia, determined looks in their eyes. He thought about the best way to handle things as the seconds to the new year counted down. The ball dropped, and he quickly pecked and hugged Willow, Cordelia, then Buffy in succession, feigning ignorance and playing a bit at the old clueless Xander of times now held onto only tenuously.

"Hey!" each of them said as he broke away to the next, including a blushing and surprised Kendra. Still dressed in the attire of his father, he stepped up onto a step stool and waited for everyone's attention.

"Xaan-der?" Kendra asked, "Why did you kiss me?"

"Well, eesa because I'm de one who usually kisses de hands of de preety ladies, no?" he smiled with a bad Zorro accent, "And to break the surprise to those of you who hadn't guessed that my roommates and I are Los Infierneros, dear Kendra. Tonight is special in many ways," he continued, now in speech-mode, "Because tonight I was visited by the relatives of Jenny Calendar, known to her Romani…gypsy…clan and tribe as Jana of the Calderash, and I acknowledged my birthright amongst them, and tomorrow I will direct them in the struggle I accepted when Rupert and Buffy entered our lives in Sunnydale. Mr. Zabuto, you have been made to keep your word as to our identities, and I thank you for it, as I am not in conflict with your Council of Watchers, but I've decided to let you, Kendra and the others who don't know my heritage, to know yet another layer. My mother was Anna Jessica of Valerious, and my father was Abraham Van Helsing."

"You're the heir to the gypsy and Garoun leadership?" the Watcher asked to clarify.

"No, I am the King of the Romani and the Garoun," Alexander Van Helsing corrected the man, "And I have called for a final War against our demonic enemies and any human that furthers their corruption of Light. Even if it means it become eventually public knowledge."

"You mustn't reveal it!' the Watcher exclaimed, "It would mean chaos, witch hunts…"

"The last time my Romani kept quiet and stayed their collective hand, they were exterminated by the totalitarians and their demonic allies."

"Totalitarians?" Buffy asked Willow in a whisper, mostly following but the word eluding her.

"Nazis, Fascists and Stalinists," Willow whispered to her, "The ones that killed my great-grandparents. Xander has my vote."

"Mine too, Will," Buffy said as Cordelia joined her in reassuring half-hugs of Willow, "Me, too."

**Wolfram and Hart Building, An Hour Earlier **

Hainsley and Vale carefully drew blood from Kakistos, currently the oldest known vampire in the world. They carefully walked into the White Room, itself currently a pentagram carefully marked for the ritual, and added four pints of blood to the four pints drawn from Drusilla to the pool of water and ash activate the restoration of the near-extinct Aurelian Clan of vampires as new offspring of Kakistos. Cyrus Vail carefully finished his part of the spell, using the inter-dimensional energies of the White Room to warp reality, turning the water into two hundred gallons of magicked blood.

Hainsley, with Vail assisting, completed the spell just before the new year began, the sounds of a hundred shrieking screams filling every part of the building as a hundred blood-portals to Hell brought into this reality five-score demons of great power to infest and assume the recreated bodies of a hundred vampires, the large quantities of blood staying their hunger and giving them each at lest the power of a hundred year old vampire. Those older received that their ash-restored bodies had held before without degradation of body by the energies, Kakistos in a circle in the middle with Drusilla unseen within the flash of dark-red light that faded, Kakistos' own form as tough as ever, but with the appearance and flexibility of his human host of centuries ago. Drusilla turned and enwrapped Kakistos with her entire body, her lusts and focus on the Oldest.

"Mm, Happy New Year, New Daddy," she purred into her King and Master's ear, "Shall we greet the Childeren now?"


	12. Chapter 12

Xander(us) Twelve Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belongs to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and is certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback and review, I might come up with something more/better. 

**Sunnydale High School Library, 9 AM, Friday January 2nd, 1998**

"Yes, quite, thank you," Giles responded, then placed the receiver down.

"So what was that about, Giles?" Buffy asked regarding the interruption of the Scooby discussion of what having the gypsies around would mean, "It sounded serious from this end."

"Well, um, yes, actually," he began, looking over at the gathered group and sighed. Zabuto and Kendra, Cordelia and Willow, Buffy and Joyce had chosen to meet and talk about the stepped up effort by Xander's group and the Romany aspects. Until disclosure on New Year's Eve, it had been easy to consider Xander's group as just another unit of independent demon hunters, but even with their numbers drastically reduced over the last eighty years, the Romany still exerted a presence in the world the would equal that of the Council, and exceed it in field force if Xander could unite them. And what Giles hadn't said, that if the young man could produce heirs and secure his line, the Garoun in particular would see it as a sign to go all-out against every vampire bastion, and reveal the truth of the dark if it meant extermination of their enemies could be achieved.

"W-Well, that was Quentin Travers, the Head of the Council," Giles noted, looking over at Sam Zabuto, "And several covens and seers with Council contacts have experienced visions acutely akin to those Buffy and Kendra did last evening, that a large number of vampires shall move to the Hell Mouth and with the power of two demons defeated once before but not killed, seek to open the Hell Mouth and unleash an army of the undead to wreak the destruction of humanity."

"That sounds a lot like a prophecy, Giles," Buffy replied quietly, "Do they know what we're facing?"

"Th-they're researching it now, Buffy," Giles explained, "And they're sending all of the Watcher's teams and known potentials to Sunnydale, including a young girl in Boston they came across last week when they were investigating rumors of an old vampire named Kakistos."

"So maybe we should tell King Doofus and his subjects so they can get their guys here, too?" Cordelia suggested, in spite of his new and improved hunkiness still in shock Xander was king of anything.

"This is serious isn't it Rupert?" Joyce asked the Watcher.

"I'm afraid it is," Giles admitted, "With as great an upset to as many seers and witches as it has created, we may very well be looking at an apocalypse if we fail to stop this."

"Um, Giles?" Willow asked, "What do you mean by teams?"

"W-well, you see, the Council funds, um Special Forces units I guess you would call them," he explained, "And there are several around the world gathering information and eliminating demonic threats."

"Kinda like what Buffy does with our help?"

"Exactly, but the Slayer is considered a team unto herself."

"Rupert," Joyce asked, "While Buffy is stuck in this destiny of hers, why doesn't she get a team to support her?"

"I-I imagine that until the last few decades, you had either the Romany independently fulfilling the functions of teams, or that there weren't any Special Forces in existence from which to recruit?"

"Mm, it still seems that there should be more support for the reason for the Council's existence," Joyce remarked.

"You won't find us in disagreement with you, Joyce," Sam Zabuto stressed, "The real problem are those in the Council that haven't spent any real time in the field for a couple of generations. While many of us still are mired in Tradition, if it keeps our Slayers alive, we very much wish to utilize updated ways."

"Then why such resistance to Buffy's friends helping?" Joyce asked.

"Because, Joyce," Rupert answered, "They are the first real help to come forward in quite a long time. So we're not geared beyond our focus on the one girl."

"But now, Mr. Giles?" Kendra asked, "Now what do you tink?"

"Now," Ripper Giles let out, "I think Xander's guns and other toys are just the thing that'll get us all to retirement age, eh Sam?" He winked.

"Even if the Council doesn't approve," Zabuto agreed, "But we'll merely leave out a few details in our journals, such as those who help."

**Xander's Base, Same Time.**

"So Enjos, we are agreed?" Alexander Van Helsing pressed, "A Garoun team and four Romany teams will be outfitted and deployed here within ten days?"

"Yes, hopefully sooner, Alexander," the older man concurred, "And with the information from our sources, and from within the Watcher's Council, we believe a Moment of Decision will occur within the next month. We will try to gather more information and organize more of the modern teams you've requested, but young people today want to give two weeks notice to their employers…"

"I was one of those young people Enjos," Alexander smiled at the Elder Romany, "And having learned a set of rules, it's actually reassuring that even when you know employers no longer are honorable, the employees still try. And besides, we'll be trying to integrate them into local and area businesses as cover, so let's not create too many minor problems."

"I understand, Alexander," the old man sighed, "Change is hard, however."

"For everyone, Enjos," Alexander replied tiredly, "For everyone."

"So, when are you going to take a wife or mistress and give us an Heir?" the old man asked Xander, who, sipping his tea nearly spat it out in surprise.

"You waited on purpose, didn't you?" he asked the old man that looked back at him with faux-innocence, "Well, why is it brought up so soon?"

"Well, it would reassure the Clans and Tribes of both Garoun and Romany that even if you and many of us fall against this fight soon to be upon us," the Elder sighed, also tiredly, "Your fight…our vengeance…our identities as Romany or Garoun will matter, Alexander."

"I don't know if I can just father a child or children without the expectation of being there, Enjos," the young man responded equally without energy, "So I can't promise anything right now."

"But you're seeing a couple of girls now, correct?" the Elder suggested without real pressure, knowing his young king would resist, "And one of the Rosenberg girls great-grandparents turns out to be Calderash, a second cousin of Angelus' victim, so there is a tie to be considered."

"Willow carries Romany blood?" Alexander responded with surprise, then chided his new advisor, "Interesting, but second cousins is a bit thin Enjos."

"I know, I know," Jana's uncle replied, "But I have to try, you are one who knows how to make the Old Ways relevant while using New Ways to achieve our traditions. That must not be allowed to stop. 'Gypsies' are considered a laughing stock or petty thieves, now. What you do will mean we either end in honor, or live with a deserved reputation as those who won the War on Darkness as others bared their throats to the demons."

"On to other topics, how are we fixed for magic?"

"We have eight orbs, and are almost done with recovering the old curses and spells, it is amazing how you've made us old ones in the Tribes young again, Alexander…but invoking the Old Ways, and embracing Justice…if not Vengeance. We should be able to curse eight vampires of your choice with very little trouble in about two weeks, as that's how long it will take to gather and relocate our last two real covens and their materials here. However, many of our gifted in the last few days have finally agreed to learn the Craft since you intend to let them 'have normal lives' as long as they also support the fight as needed. Again, that middle way, plus the girls are all starry-eyed about returned royalty and the young men finally get to fight for equally romantic and stupid reasons to impress the girls, if you'll forgive my words."

"That's alright, Old Wolf," Xander smiled, "I may have more experience than before, but I still am one of those young men. If your king calls you to a crusade to avenge the murder of your family and ancestors, it's glory and romance as well as the dirt and the blood; if your dad wants you to do it, it's like taking out the garbage or some other chore. And don't even get me started on the Garoun now that they know I was Hyena-possessed…"

"That is scary Alexander, those Wolves have been whittled down for a century, and you've given them a strange and almost religious totem in yourself…Primal Canine, but not a Were…the Heir returned to the Kingship…at the darkest time…if they weren't related to Romany, I'd still accuse them of it they are so superstitious."

"But Enjos, most of the Romany superstitions are true, or an income source against the gullible."

"That doesn't change anything, Alexander, they're scary about fighting for you even more than any of their hot-headed cubs have been against wanting suicide attacks on the vampire strongholds."

"Enjos, what's next on the agenda?"

"Fortunately for you? I believe it is that meal you call brunch."

"Good, I need to go meet with the Slayer side of things in a while, so I'll see you this afternoon."

"Hey Joe!" the construction excavator shouted, "Hold up! There's this big rock-statue thing! Better call those college guys before we hear about it from the 'Save the Whatever' crowd."


	13. Chapter 13

Xander(us) Thirteen, The Devil's Due Author: Tohonomike Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners.. Joss/ME characters. The Star Gate characters belong to Gekko/Sci-Fi/others and are certainly not mine. I do not and cannot make money off of this, but for feedback, I might come up with something more/better. 

**The Xander Cave, January 13th, 1998**

The Romany had come to town, lodging with Xander and around the corner and a block down on Crawford Street, three teams in training learning firearms and small unit tactics with Gunn and some of his people from the now-occupied Hyperion lending a hand. The magic-oriented and Elders stayed at the mansion while the 'rowdier' elements took to the Cave.

"What do you have for me, Enjos?" Alexander asked his Romany advisor, "Anything on the Kakistos and Drusilla rumors out of Los Angeles?" The idea of another Master-level vampire and Drusilla could only mean trouble for the Hell Mouth defenders.

"Just a few small…bits," Enjos conceded, "They are rumored to have resurrected some of the Aurelian vampires, how we do not know, because we haven't been able to get a hold of any of the rumored vampires." He sighed, and touched on the next and equally troubling subject, "One of our sources did, however, talk to that green demon at the tavern, who overheard two vampires talking about Drusilla and two old demons she's 'bringing to a party' in Sunnydale, and unfortunately, according to Mr. Giles, it could be the Judge."

"The Judge?" Alexander asked, staring into the eyes of his advisor for extra confirmation, "This could be very bad, our only hope is that she decides to finish putting him together here, or rushes him at us immediately after putting him together in LA."

"Unfortunately, there seems to be some dark magics at work to block our few scryers," the old man continued, "Or we'd be able to attack instead of wait."

"Alright, for the next few nights we'll concentrate in larger sweeps, in the dock and industrial areas," Alexander emphasized, "And maybe we'll get lucky. Have our people started researching the Judge, Kakistos and the Aurelians if you haven't already ordered it."

"Already being done, Alexander," the Romany Elder replied, "Which leaves one more extremely puzzling concern…" Enjos showed him a police report. The pictures and description of the stolen item set Xander's nerves on edge, the manner of the death of the museum specialist, Dr. Perren, of a vampire attack made the problem one of profound importance given the Drusilla rumors.

"Acathla?" Xander sighed softly, his actual youth showing through for a moment, then turned toward Enjos again to see the man nodding gravely, "Is Rupert looking into this?"

"As per your instructions, I informed him immediately, though he'd already had your girlfriend Willow investigating on their computers."

"Good," Xander replied, a distant look in his eyes, "Two of the worst, a group of Aurelius vampires, Drusilla and Kakistos, all at the same time…not a coincidence, Enjos, not a coincidence."

"The Watcher teams are in town, as are several from the Council who've learned of our presence here and wish to meet with you."

"Gah, it figures," Xander replied, shaking his head, "Anything in particular?"

"They probably want to talk alliance and terms, Alexander, after all, with the sudden revival of the Romany and Garoun as offensive forces, and your father's reputation…"

"How could they not wish to further their own interests? Yes, I know, but how much do they know?"

"If they got their information from listening to excited Garoun, then whatever you've told us would be the limit, though they might also think you're your father reborn, they do not strike me as able to fully use their minds for original thought." The old man noticed Xander look at him with a cocked eyebrow, "Your friend Rupert and Mr. Zabuto being possible exceptions due to actual contact with the supernatural and people who've worked for a living." This latter comment brought a smile to Xander's face.

"Hey!" Kowalski complained as he entered the room, with the Doyles behind him, "Francis might've never worked an honest day in his life, but I remember working at least once." The soldier smirked as he dropped a hand-written pile of notes on the desk and sat down, nodding to the gypsy elder as he did, "Anyway, between training sweeps and nest purging, we've pretty much reduced the vampire attacks in town to 'normal' levels. These vampires seem to be pouring in because of the rumors regarding Kakistos and his 'army of undead.'" 'Harry' interrupted at this point.

"We've also noticed some of the better-armed vampires seem to be coming from New York and Boston, so some of them might actually be part of Kakistos' minions."

"Better armed?" Xander stressed, "How so?"

"Normal handguns and such any street criminal would carry," Doyle waved away, "Being vampires they don't tend to use 'em, but carry them outta habit, but we might want to think about vests and such pretty soon."

**Wolfram and Hart, Los Angeles, Same Time**

"Mm, fresh virgin's blood," the resurrected Angelus said, smacking his lips, then looking to the door as his new Master and Mistress came in, "I can see working for you is going to be a pleasure." He noticed the old vampire raise a residual eyebrow at him, and inwardly scoffing, "Sire."

"Sonny!" Drusilla gushed while holding onto Kakistos' arm, "We're a family again, we is. Your brothers and sisters are rising as we speak."

"So what's the plan…Sire," Angelus asked his new Master, who looked nothing like Darla unfortunately, "I hope it involves the Hell Mouth and a lot of killing."

"I told you he'd be your good boy, I did," Dru crooned into the ear of the old vampire, "Just the thing to kill us the Slayers while you become our King, milord."

"Perhaps," Kakistos conceded, holding out his ringed hand for Angelus to kiss in the old rites, acknowledging him as Sire and Lord. The resurrected vampire paused then did as expected, the taste of the fresh kill still pleasing him enough for the moment, "Angelus, you will take some of your old companions with you to the Hell Mouth, and create havoc while others in my service put something together and dig something up." The old demon smiled at his own wittiness in letting just a little of the truth out. "I expect you to kill the Slayers and their Watchers before the end of next week. Do you think this a problem?"

"Not at all, is Summers still a Slayer?" Angelus asked, receiving a nod from his new sire in return, "Then next Wednesday is her birthday. We'll simply attack then and make it a surprise party." Down the hall, Holland Manners cocked an eyebrow in curiosity from the sound of evil laughter.

**Sunnydale, January 16th, 1998**

Mister Treat pulled the charter bus into the warehouse near the docks, it being just before sunrise, kicking the body of the driver out of the way as the 'new kids' got out and looked around.

"Not my usual accommodations, but this will do," the human-looking Joseph Nest quipped as he joined twenty Aurelians and twenty of Kakistos newer minions, "So what now?" Even in human form the evil oozed from this one.

"Now we wait until night, when you, Angelus and the rest do your thing and I return to our boss in LA."

**Saturday, 8 PM, the Vampire Warehouse**

Three large gas trucks pulled into the large building, brimming with gasoline. Spike and two of his former minions alighted and swaggered up to Angelus and Darla.

"Hey kids," he smirked, "I figured rather than going to the quickie mart for refills all the time, we could just go from here and burn what ya want, anything left over we'll turn some locals and make 'em soften up the party by blowin' 'em up next to the building, eh?"

"So you started to think William?" Darla half-sneered, half-complimented as she bit Angelus' ear lobe and rubbed her hands across his chest, "That's an improvement over the last time I saw you."

"Well toots, give a man a century, and his killin' skills are bound to improve," he pontificated, then allowed a nasty sneer of his own, "Angel excluded of course."

**Joyce's Gallery, 11PM**

The alarm rang as bricks and burning gas cans flew through the windows and door of the building, eight dark forms swaggering away as one whistled an Irish tune of centuries past.

'We'll see if the blonde bunny-girl gets a clue before her birthday…' William the Bloody smirked to himself, 'At least it's Angelus' arse on the line if he screws this up, and I might just get the Slayer myself.'

**Buffy's House, Midnight**

"Yeah, Mom, it was weird, first the…" Buffy began, relaying her night to her mother as the phone rang. Joyce picked it up, paling as the voice on the line continued. Joyce set the handset in the cradle.

"That was the police," Joyce gasped, swaying, "Someone vandalized and set fire to the gallery…"

**Sunday, 8PM, Apartment of Rupert Giles**

Rupert Giles quickly pulled Jenny down behind the couch as the bookcases shook and splintered from some type of incendiary device. Looking around the end of the furniture, he noted the damage had mostly been absorbed by the singed and newly burning bookcases containing rather unimportant textbooks and novels.

"What is it Rupert?" the dark-haired teacher asked.

"I think we're under attack," he deadpanned and handed her the phone as he drew a rapier from under the couch, "Please call Xander and then the police if you would." He was about to say more as he heard vehicles crashing into the courtyard of his apartment building, another following a moment later as Jenny got off the phone from reporting the problem."

The front door and bookcases shuddered, the enter wall framing bending and starting to give as what looked to be a delivery truck managed to force its way into contact. A moment later, the wall began to collapse.

"Get upstairs, Jenny," Rupert told her, "In my bedroom I have flare guns, shotguns and swords, I fear we'll need them. Once the integrity of the building disappears, it is unlikely they'll need an invitation to enter a ruin."

"Who Rupert?"

"Them…" he replied with a grimace, pointing at six dark forms looking in and pulling the truck free of its wedged location, "Presumably vampires."

**Sunday, 8:20PM, Apartment of Rupert Giles**

Giles fired down the stairs four times in a row, the quick collapse of the front of his home, and the resultant fires up-top seeming to allow entry just moments before as a second wall started to buckle from another collision. He could hear the laughing downstairs.

"Come on Slayer's Daddy, come out and play," a lower class British accent called out, "School's out and I don't see any fire axes to save anyone this time." 'Why is that familiar?' Giles asked himself as Jenny handed him a fully loaded weapon.

The window in the next window crashed in, as did the one here. Giles turned, Jenny ducked aside and into the closet, the shotgun gouging large holes into two of the three minions in his bedroom, flooring them in agony as the other twisted and rolled behind the bed. Giles could hear feet racing up the stairs, and turned to check the hallway to see if the vampires had reached the top. They had.

Behind him he heard his old double-barrel go off, Jenny screaming from the pain to her ears in the tight confines of the closet, the vampire with them dusting as a brick flew into the room, bouncing off the closet door frame and glancing the teacher in the head. Rupert meanwhile fired down the hall toward the guest room twice, dropped the weapon as screams and dust greeted his action, and used an old Webley to fire toward the stairs to catch a vampire in the face three times and his partner behind him in his face twice as they both screamed in pain and rage.

Xander charged into the collapsing building, his immediate teammates with him as they attempted to secure the collapsing entry. He fired his M-16 in three bursts of three, catching three minions facing away completely unawares, flooring them. Enjos moved forward as if on a Sunday walk, using his cane to finish the beasts off as his lord continued to advance and fire.

"Enjos, stay back!" Alexander ordered.

"And disgrace the Tribes by abandoning your back!" the old man grimaced mockingly, "I'm an Elder, not a child, milord." The fire was spreading, and the Romany team outside reported engagement behind the place, a man carrying a woman across the rear rooftops. Automatic fire from the rear off the house followed by screams from upstairs, then screams form the team as they came under attack.

"Back out and around, Enjos, go drive around back, I think Jana will be found with Rupert and need a doctor; Charlie, Doyle, with me." And with that they abandoned the ruined residence for a more open field of fight.

More gunfire, two screams cut off and sirens finally sounding in the distance, Alexander and his companions rolled on the ground and proceeded to target and dust four gun-wielding vampires, bursts at a range of only twenty feet from side and rear ending their fight and then unlives. They hurried forward, Giles' apartment building finally exploding from leaking gas lines behind them. Two Romany of the second team were dead from gunshot wounds, and two more had been clawed and slammed by less-modern bloodsuckers and needed a doctor.

"Alexander, I have Rupert and Jana," the Elder reported over the comm. set, "We are taking her to the hospital now."

"Gotcha, we're right behind with our own," he reported back, "We lost two."

Four vampires leapt from the roof of the adjacent building, revolvers cracking and forcing the teams down as they melted into the darkness.

**Sunday, 11PM, Old Harris House**

"Huh?" Xander responded to Giles question as he stared at the smoldering ruin of his former household. They'd just dropped off Jenny at 'The Base' when the call had come in.

"I asked who would care to do this, and why leave a message on the Library answering machine. First, bombing my apartment, then your place. I'm just fortunate that last month you helped me move those bookcases over the window in case such a thing might occur."

"I don't know, maybe someone has finally figured out who's been dusting the vamps in this town and wanted to start an escalation?"

"Perhaps, but it's not as if you live here any more."

"So it might be someone with old intel, or they haven't been around in a few months. And I can think of only one 'person' that's gotten away from us."

"Drusilla?"

"Who else? This seems to be more of an Angelus thing, but if it isn't a fluke or a new player…"

"I-I see, best we plan for the worst and perhaps recheck old hideouts and lairs tomorrow."

"And find out what you can on the Aurelians, past and extant, as I've read that minions tend to follow the behavior established by their sires at least somewhat, so it might give us a better idea of the mindset."

"Good thinking."

"It should be, those were your words from just before those Bezoar demons."

**Monday Morning, 4am, Rosenberg Home**

Willow awoke from her sleep, realizing her home was on fire. She looked out the window, thinking she saw a dark form leap away as the roof seemed to be engulfed in flame, and she grabbed her phone, speed-dialing Xander's home. She prayed he'd pick up, panic starting to creep in when a male voice picked up.

"This is Doyle."

"Doyle! This is Willow! My house is on fire and I think the people who did it are still outside!"

"Hold on Willow!" she heard Doyle tell her as an alarm began to ring in the background on his side of the line, "We'll be there quick!"

**Monday Morning, 4:10am, Rosenberg Home**

Willow's Willow crashed inward, causing the girl to move out of the way as she had just heard similar, louder crashes throughout her home. Gunfire outside and the screech of cars overwhelmed her ability to process. She fainted.

Xander Harris quickly rolled up his red-headed girlfriend in her comforter and made his way back outside, a certain blonde slayer emptying another large industrial fire extinguisher onto the roof to cover Xander's exit and drop to the ground before following.

"Thanks, Buff," Xander greeted his favorite blonde slayer, kissing her on the cheek as he started waking up Willow. He didn't notice her stop and put her hand to the cheek as he started gentling bringing Willow back to consciousness.

Looking around, and as firemen showed up, the Romany withdrew after kicking around the dust of four minions around the lawn where they wouldn't be noticed. Charlie, Doyle and Harriet helped the Rosenbergs out the door of the house, the exterior and interior now both awash in flames.

No one noticed the grimacing large-foreheaded individual in the shadows of the house across the street. Another form smirked next to him in distaste.

"Kinda runnin' out of help, Angelus," Spike told the other, "And where did they get these hunter buggers anyway?"

"Shut up Billy."

**Monday, School Library, Lunch Hour**

"Xander, you're here already?" Willow asked tiredly, "Are you skipping classes?"

"No Wills," Xander replied, "GED and placement exams last week, remember?"

"Does Snyder know, yet?"

"I didn't plan on telling him right away, not high on priorities like a certain gal I know?" He hugged her and they sat down next to each other.

"Mm, I like hearing that," she replied as Jenny and Giles came out of his office and a laughing Cordelia and Buffy entered through the main doors, then mock-sighed, "But if I can't have you exclusively…"

"So Willow?" Buffy called over, "How're your folks handling things?"

"Well, they're meeting with the insurance people today, and then we might rent a place until we sort things out, the motel room's a little small even if my folks are going to yet another conference day after tomorrow."

"You could stay at my house while your folks skip town," Cordelia offered, receiving looks from the others, "What! It's not like we're enemies any more and my parents are gone off to New York for the next two weeks. Plenty of room."

"Wow, thanks Cordelia," Willow replied, "I'd like that."


End file.
